Catch
by Katsura018
Summary: An assistant, Sa-Ka-Ki Tet-Su-Nos-Ke Yo!, and a spoiled alien princess becomes overly attached to Hijikata, what would Gintoki do? And what would happen if Sakamoto wanted to make a contract with the princess and asked his friend Kintoki(Gintoki) for help, but the princess wants the vice-chief in return, would Gintoki help? And why mention Tetsu in the summary? GinHiji established.
1. Chapter 1

Catch

* * *

"Gin-chan, Shinpachi, let's play catch!" Kagura invited the two as she nearly took out the sliding door from its hinges. Gintoki didn't bother to notice her as he continued to stay lying on the couch, a jump magazine covering his face. "Catch?" Shinpachi asked, he was at the middle of cleaning up the office, dusting its cabinets and wiping the tables. "Yeah! It's a really nice day today and a lot of people are playing at the park! Let's go-aru!" Kagura insisted, jumping high enough to land on top of Gintoki, right in the gut. "guwoooh!" the weird sound coming from Gintoki's covered mouth and Kagura's critical hit.

"Gin-chan! Let's go! Gin-chan Let's go-aru!" She persisted. She punched the jump magazine enough to keep it stuck on the lazy man's face and grabbed him by the shoulder, shaking him as she kept on insisting them to go outside. "Uskfdjooppppdsfjjk~!" Gintoki tried to speak, his hands trying to reach for the jump magazine and take it out. "Just go with it Gin-san, it's not like you have anything better to do." Shinpachi comments, he was already used to the violence. "That's right Gin-chan! Stop being a pathetic excuse for an adult and at least entertain your master! And Shinpachi you'll be going too!" She continued to order. Gintoki snaps and kicks Kagura off of him, who land safely on the floor.

Gintoki sits up and grabs the jump magazine on his face and removes it. "You Brats! Catch? How old do you think I am? Wait, I'm not that old! I have better things to do too rather than playing in the park! Just go get Sadaharu and have him catch your balls!" Gintoki scolded, not that he was taken seriously by the two. Gintoki stood up and walked to leave the place. When he opened the door, Kagura and Shinpachi kicks his back and makes him fall from the balcony "UUUURIIIIYAAA!". Gintoki screams, then he felt soft fur below him, he fell on Sadaharu. "Arf!" Sadaharu barked. Shinpachi and Kagura also get on top of the huge dog and with another bark Sadaharu rushes toward the park. "NOOOOO~!" Gintoki's protest ignored.

* * *

Now at the park, Kagura as the leader holding the ball while Gintoki, Shinpachi, and Sadaharu stood a few feet away in front of Kagura. "Ready?" she screamed loud enough for the others to hear. "Yeah!" Shinpachi replied, loud enough as well. "…such a bother" Gintoki yawned, now that he was there, he didn't feel like the day was any different from the other days. There was a normal number of people around, the brat probably saw some kids playing catch too that's why she insisted on them playing along with this. "Okay!-" Kagura gripped the ball. "-Here-" She holds it up above her chest with both hands, hard. "-It-" She stretches her arm as much as she can behind her while lifting one leg. "-GOOOOO!" And she finally launches it. "IMPOSSIBLE!" Shinpachi screamed, running away already and covering his head. Gintoki wasn't paying attention and just stood there watching the other people in the park. Then, the ball passes him, with incredible speed, mere inches from his cheek. Half of his face turns black and snaps again. "HOW THE HELL ARE WE SUPPOSE TO CATCH THAT?"

"THAT ITSN'T CATCH AT ALL! This is some sort of death game isn't it? You have more balls don't you? Some of them explode don't they? What are they? Trackers? Crackers?" Gintoki snapped and continued on scolding the girl. "What are you talking about? You can't even catch that? Look at Sadaharu!-aru" Kagura pointed at the dog… who was able to successfully catch the ball. "SERIOUSLY?!" Shinpachi and Gintoki both screamed. "Good boy Sadaharu! You're nothing like those weaklings!" Kagura petted the dog as he returned the ball.

While Sadaharu was heading back to where Gintoki and Shinpachi was, he looked at both of them… and somehow, from Shinpachi and Gintoki's point of view, smirked. _What's with that dog? Are you challenging us? Are you seriously challenging us to catch that thing? BRING IT ON! _They both thought. "Okay here comes another! This time I'll make it a bit slower!" Kagura screamed. "Yeah! Bring it on! Give it all you've got Kagura-chan!" GIntoki screamed back, now serious. "Yeah! I'll definitely catch it somehow! Like hell I'll be losing to a dog!" Shinpachi added. "Arf!" Sadaharu barked!

"Here it comes!" And the leader releases the ball, with seemingly the same speed and force as the first one. "GAAAAAAAAAAH!" And so, it continued. The second ball was caught by Sadaharu, smirking at the two again. The third one was caught by Sadaharu, this time looking at the two with pity. The fourth ball went a bit off course and nearly hit an innocent bystander, but she was able to dodge the ball. But she wasn't able to dodge the huge dog and the angry samurai trying to chase the ball. After the first accident, more accident happened. Innocent bystanders would not get hit by the ball but by the ones chasing after it. Shinpachi had already given up and is sulking at the corner.

From hitting bystanders, Kagura tried to make the ball spin and add curve to the ball as it flew, now flying pass the park's fountain, which gets destroyed by the samurai and huge dog. "OUT OF THE WAY!" "AAAAAAAARF!" There were less people around. Hasegawa was screaming in the background already to stop them from destroying his…home(?) and ended up sulking at the corner where Shinpachi was.

"Ahahah! Gin-chan hasn't caught a ball yet!" Kagura cheered as Sadaharu brought back the ball for the 38th time. "Yeah! Yeah, just keep it coming brat. This is after all good exercise for Sadaharu, and with me acting like I'm serious will add to his motivation right? Yeah, yeah! We're taking good care of Sadaharu!" Gintoki nearly snapped. "YOU LIAR!" Shinpachi at least tried to do his role.

"Oi, oi, What the hell are you guys doing?" They heard the familiar voice. Hijikata appeared behind Kagura, dressed in his casual clothes, not working as of the moment. "Ah! It's Toshi-aru, Wanna join?" Kagura invited. "Join?" Hijikata asked. "Yeah! We're playing catch!" Kagura explained. "Catch? That's what happened here? Well… I'm not really surprised anymore…" Hijikata looked around, a destroyed fountain, some craters, injured people, and a ton of dirt and pieces of the park's concrete all over the place. "Ah! Shinsengumi vice-chief! Stop them, stop them please!" Hasegawa begged. "…I'm off duty tough…and I don't really want to get involved with these guys" HIjikata declined coldly.

"Then you can join-aru!" Kagura invited again. "Yeah, yeah Hijikata-kun, let's play~!" Gintoki sang, teasing the man into playing with them. "Please don't mind them HIjikata-san, it's okay…" Shinpachi tried. "No, I don't have anything better to do anyway, okay, I'll join in but…" he surprisingly agreed with Kagura. "but what?" Kagura asked. "…how about we add some proper rules so this place doesn't end up any more worst than it already is…" Hijikata pointed out.

* * *

So the five of them, Hijikata, Gintoki, Sadaharu, Hasegawa, and Kagura were all positioned far away from each other forming a pentagon to play catch. "SO THIS AUTHOR IS LEAVING ME OUT OF IT? DO YOU HAVE A GRUDGE ON ME? IS it because I keep being paired with Gin-san and you prefer GinHiji? It's not like I want to be paired!" Shinpachi cursed… so an invisible force placed him back on the gloomy corner.

"Okay… let's do this!" Kagura started, throwing the ball toward Gintoki. It was headed directly toward the man. Gintoki puts both hands on his chest ready to receive the extremely fast ball. Once it made contact with his hand, as if on super saiyan mode he nearly buried his feet on the ground below him to keep himself from moving and receiving the ball with all his might. "UUUUWOOOOOOH!" he groaned as the ball kept spinning in his hand till it stopped, smoking and revealing the ultimate redness Gintoki's poor hands. After that, he sucks in the pain and releases the ball in full speed, toward… Sadaharu. It was the strongest he can manage. It went nearly as fast as the one Kagura threw. Sadaharu's eyes change in a more fierce and serious way and opens his mouth.

The ball was directed at his mouth, he closed it the millisecond it was in to bite the spinning ball. Just like Gintoki, his fur somehow turned golden and electrocuted, super saiyan mode. He clutched the ball with his teeth until it stopped spinning. He smirks again at Gintoki with the ball inside his mouth, Gin smirks back. _What the hell happened between those two earlier…_ Hijikata thought. "Nooo! I don't want to play, Why did I get added in this? I didn't want to join! No one invited my anyway! Why am I here? Also, how it that dog planning on throwing the ball?!" Hasegawa cried, after seeing the fierce throwing Kagura and Gintoki did.

_Eh? Now that I think of it, how is that dog going to throw the ball?_ Hijikata thought, like the world had paused he had a bunch of ideas run in his mind. Some of them being, picturing Sadaharu putting the ball on top of his head and making it bounce, while it's still in the air, Sadaharu would hit it using his tail like a baseball bat. Another way would be to simply throw it with this mouth, but that would lead to a really weak throw, so he'll be good at catching but the worst in throwing? Another way, also using his mouth, he would put it in his mouth and spit out with all his might, and it would be covered in dog saliva! Hijikata's face turned a bit blue and he stopped thinking, instead watched intently on how Sadaharu would throw.

Sadaharu stood up, _EH? _He released the ball from his mouth, _Eh?_ The ball fell on his paw, he positioned it to where the ball would fall, below his chest(?) _Eh?_ And threw the ball like a normal person, only as strong as Kagura or Gintoki. _EEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHH?! _Unfortunately, Hijikata was caught off guard and wasn't ready to receive such a fast ball. Instead, the ball hit him directly on the gut and carried him off to the wall behind him, letting blood out of his head and losing consciousness.

"Hijikata-kun!"

"Hijikata-san?! Are you alright?"

"Toushi!"

"Arf!"

"Oogushi-kun!"

"Demon Vice Commander!"

"Weird Hair Style Guy!"

"Mayo-freak!"

"Tsundere-kun!"

"Die…"

_What the hell with those names?! And that last one? Die? You want me to die? How did Sogou get here? And who the hell are you calling a tsundere?_

* * *

At Odd-jobs Gin-chan's office the group had decided that they bring back Hijikata there to rest. It was already very late. Hasegawa sighed and sat at the park bench, left by the others, he laid down. He covered himself with newspapers for a blanket, a tear seemed to appear from the side of his sunglasses as the camera view backed away and showed him lying on the bench, the only thing not destroyed in the park, basically he was in the middle of a place that seemed like an after earthquake sight.

"See you tomorrow Gin-san!" Shinpachi waved goodbye from the front gate of his family's dojo. Gintoki only nodded and continued walking, carrying Hijikata on his back. "Damn it… That Sadaharu, Kagura-chan too! Not even coming with me or even helping me carry this guy back to the Shinsengumi…" Gintoki grumbled as he continued walking. Hijikata mumbled something he couldn't hear properly and the former Joi turned to the side to look. "What?" He asked, knowing he wouldn't receive an answer. Hijikata's face was right in view, his sleeping face. Gintoki continued walking and continued staring at that face.

He trips on a small rock but was able to fix his balance with his other foot, reminding himself he has to look where he was going, it seemed he missed a turn. "Tch… that was close… Oi! Did you see that? I nearly tripped; my handsome face would've been damaged if my face the ground you know! It'll be your fault!" he softly scolded. He hears the vice-commander whine a bit and sees that his eyebrows furrowed within a second. "We're finally alone but you just have to be asleep… And today was your long awaited day off too… those brats just had to ruin it…" Gintoki sighed as he smiled. He gives the sleeping demon a peck in the cheek and continued walking.

* * *

Author: I didn't reread… I'm sorry for grammar errors, misused words, OOC chars, awful tsukomi lines, aha(I tried…); characters are not mine, first Gintama fic! YAAAAAY! I'm completely addicted! Yay for no more reruns and new arc weeeeeeeeeeee! And GinHiji! Yes GinHiji! XDDDD


	2. Chapter 2

Catch Ch 2

* * *

"Da…nna… you…" Okita stuttered. He was currently staring at Gintoki, carrying Hijikata on his back in front of the Shinsengumi gate. "No… Okita-kun this isn't what it looks like at-" Gintoki tried to explain. In less than a second Okita kneeled down in front of the former Joi and bowed his head. "Thank you very much for dirtying your hands to finally end Hijikata-san's life!" He shouted. _EEEEEEEHHH! THAT"S WRONG!_ Gintoki thought, Okita really did want the vice-chief dead. Okita stood up and faced Gintoki seriously. "Now if you would allow me to take you in to custody…" Okita started, Gintoki only gaped while drops of sweat kept running down his face and neck. "…for killing vice-chief and for the securing my position as the next vice-commander" Okita finished.

Gintoki snapped and raised his knee enough to kick the brat, which Okita dodged. Gintoki kept kicking while he talked "That's not it! He's not dead! Are you blind! With all shit you put him through you think he would die easily? And if were, shove that thank you up your ass if you're just going to use and blame me to make you vice-chief!" Okita easily dodged all his kicks. Okita grunted, knowing Hijikata was alive.

"Oh! Yorozuya! What are you- To-Toushi?! What happened?" Kondo arrived, noticing Hijikata being carried by the Odd-Jobs Boss. "He… err… he's drunk! Yes, he's drunk!" Gintoki lied, finally stopped trying to kick Okita. "Drunk? But why is his head bandaged? Is he injured? It's a bit red too…" Kondo noticed. "Well… he was so drunk that he hit a wall ahaha~" Gintoki lied again. "I just spotted him in the sidewalk and thought I'd be nice enough to bring him back here!" he lied again.

"Oh, I see! Thanks a lot!" Kondo smiled wholeheartedly believing. "Then, I'll be taking him…" Kondo approached Gintoki with his hands ready to grab the vice-chief off of Gintoki. "Please let me!" an unfamiliar voice shouted. Okita, Kondo, and Gintoki all turned their head to where it came from. It was Sasaki Tetsu-kun, Hijikata's assistant, he was still there. "Please let me carry the vice-chief back to his quarters, as his assistant and friend!" he asked Kondo. Kondo looked at him for a moment but moved out of the way eventually letting Tetsu grab the vice-chief off of Gintoki.

"Eh? You're still here?" Gintoki asked. "Yes! It is nice to see you're doing well, Danna. Then, I'll be taking care of the vice-chief now, Thank you very much for taking care of him!" Tetsu said happily with the brightest smile he could make. As the three watched as Hijikata got carried off by Tetsu, they were quiet. Okita broke the silence "Hey… Kondo-san… Doesn't that guy seem too attached to Hijikata-san?"

Gintoki raised an eyebrow at what the brat said. "What are you saying? It's normal! He sincerely admires Toushi!" Kondo laughed. "Well… I'll be going now…" Gintoki bothered to mention, waving already at the two. "No no no… Sougo, give him a ride home as thanks!" Kondo ordered. "Fine, fine…"

In the police car, "Danna… It seems, you have a rather troublesome competition…right?" Okita said, ignored by GIntoki. Okita smiled at his silence. When they reached their destination, before getting off, Gintoki opened his mouth. "I don't know what competition you're talking about, Okita-kun" Gin said, opening the car door and finally getting out. Before closing the door, Okita replied "Good Luck with that, Danna." Gin closed the door and Okita drove away, Gin stared at the car as it disappeared from his view. _What competition… That guy? _The image of Tetsu and Hijikata appeared in his head, at first it was them having fun, drinking, sitting across each other. Then it was them drinking, sitting next to each other. Then it was them playing video games, sitting too close to each other and lastly was a blurred image… the silhouette of Hijikata under Tetsu…._Pft… Impossible…Impossible…_he laughed.

* * *

The next day, there was a sudden announcement of a parade. Everyone was invited, or rather forced to go. The people were verbally forced by some shinsengumi members to go outside and watch and cheer for the parade. It was a parade, showing the beauty and brilliance of another planet, Quaforve. They apparently appeared without notice, bringing their beloved princess to show off to the humans. The Shinsengumi was really annoyed by this actually.

"I can't see anything, Gin-chan…" Kagura complained. "What do you want me to do? Scare the parade from behind and have them running for their lives so they can go faster?" He asked as a joke, he wouldn't seriously do that. "Ah! That would be fun-aru!" Kagura actually looked excited. "No no, you can't do that…" Gintoki regretted making the joke.

"Kagura-chan, Gin-san!" Shinpachi called out, he was raising his hand in the air for the two to see. All the people were currently on the sidewalks to get a view of the parade. The sidewalks were filled with people. The entire road would serve as a pathway for the parade. Gin, Kagura, and now Shinpachi were located at the edge of the intersection, getting full view of the depressed and angered faces of the drivers who suddenly got stopped for the parade. In front of the cars was two Shinsengumi officers, they were in charge of the traffic and security of the parade.

"Ah… I kinda feel sorry for them…" Shinpachi mentioned, looking at the drivers. "It's that entire alien's fault, appearing without a notice and wanting a parade for herself… causing a lot of trouble-" Gin commented. "Yes! She must be some selfish spoiled princess! She probably get left behind all the time which is why she wants all the lower beings attention, she must be a really bad mouth with false teeth and-" Kagura carried on insulting the princess.

"Oi, oi, what are you talking about over there?" Hijikata asked, appearing on the road from a police motorcycle. "Oh! Toushi!" Kagura greeted. "This situation must be really troublesome, Hijikata-san…" Shinpachi sympathized. "So – so… also, don't go spouting rude things about this aliens, who knows what would happen if they overheard you. Just a warning" he left with that, approaching the two Shinsengumi members that were stationed to control the traffic at that intersection giving them more instructions and reminders for when the parade passes.

Hijikata ignored the angry yelling that was directed at him from the drivers stuck in traffic. They all yelled and screamed extremely rude words at the vice-chief. "That's harsh…" Shinpachi commented. "Yeah! F*ck the Police!" Gintoki joined in. "Why are you joining in! You're not even stuck in traffic! And why are you talking in Engrish?" Shinpachi commented. "Yeah, yeah! Worthless! Give us back our tax!" Kagura joined as well, Gintoki was an awesome role model. "Why are you joining in as well?" Shinapachi tried to stop them.

Hijikata could ignore the comments from the drivers… but… not the ones who just joined in for the heck of it. He snapped and threw his lighter at the former Joi. "You! Just shut the hell up!" He shouted. It hit Gintoki right in the forehead. "Ouch! What was that for? You really weren't doing your job anyway! And now you're abusing the fact you're a cop and hurting random innocent people?" Gintoki yelled back. "Who's not doing his job? And how can you even call yourself innocent, huh?" Hijikata yelled back. "I'm innocent! You're abusing your authority!" Gintoki yelled back. Hijikata approaches him; they were now face to face, mere centimeters away from each other, just like always. "Gin-san! Hijikata-san! Stop that please, the reason you two are fighting is really worthless, this is too pathetic too watch!" Shinpachi tried.

"Ah! Gin-chan! There it is! There it is! I can see it-aru!" Kagura pointed at the huge floater. It was huge, pink, overly decorated with pearls and silver with touches of gold. At the very top, surrounded by her loyal bodyguards and underneath a shell shaped roof with dangling pearls of silver and gold, with millions of tiny ribbons decorated on the top, was the princess. "It…It looks awful… they completely overdid it to the point it looks like a rainbow unicorn pooped on it…" Shinpachi commented. "What? It isn't that bad…" Kagura argued.

"Tch, I got distracted…" Hijikata cursed, he went inside the sidewalk with the others, to not get crushed by the floater. "Oi! It's already full here!" Gintoki complained. "What are you- tch, I don't have time for you… " Hijikata ignored him and grabbed his radio from his inner packet and pressed the button to talk. "Tetsu? Sougo?" Hijikata called. [Here! Hijikata-san!] Tetsu replied, he was with Okita since, Okita rarely replied seriously when Hijikata called him. "The princess is now in the 5th intersection, have you let the ones not passing the main road go?" Hijikata asked. [Yes, the cars are moving now, except for the ones going for the main road] Tetsu reported. "good… that's all, keep a close eyes on things there…" Hijikata ended the call. [Yes!] Tetsu bothered to reply.

"Alright…" Hijikata said to himself; once the floater passed them, he got on the main road and rode the police bike again. "Ah, leaving already?" Gintoki asked. "Yeah… have to go to the next intersection, I was suppose to leave before the floater came here you know!" He blamed the albino. "Eh? And how is that my fault?" Gintoki yelled. "It is completely your fault! You had the nerve to distract me with your stupid complains! That doesn't even make sense!" Hijikata snapped. "AH? What was that? You should've just ignored me then! Don't blame for what you do!" Gintoki pointed out. Kagura and Shinpachi… with the others in the sidewalk and traffic silently watched, amused.

"Ignore yo-" Hijikata started. [Toushi?] He heard from his radio, it was Kondo-san. He grabbed the radio. "Here, What is it Kondo-san?" He asked. [You're at the 5th intersection right? I heard from Tetsu, you can leave me and the old man with the rest, just watch the parade from the back] Kondo instructed. "Roger…" Hijikata complied.

After placing back the radio in his inner pocket, he instructed the two Shinsegumi members to fix the intersection's traffic, eventually relieving some stress from the drivers. Hijikata, returned to the sidewalk, obviously to avoid getting hit, since he was in the middle of the main road. When he got back in the crowd, everyone just stared at him, only Gintoki's stare annoyed him the most though. "What are you looking at?" Hijikata asked, annoyed.

"Umm, Officer-san, can we go now?" a innocent civilian asked, the parade already passed them anyway and most of the civilians had gone back to their business as well, since they were forced to cheer and please the aliens. "Yeah… err, sorry for the trouble. Trust me we don't like this job as much as you do." Hijikata honestly said. A vein popped on the civilian's forehead, and spat on Hijikata's shoes, quickly running and yelling "F*ck the POLICE!" Officers have it tough.

Hijikata stood silently while Gintoki sneered at him, Kagura giggled but mentioned something about pitying him and Shinpachi stood frozen. "Well… you guys really don't do your job that wel-" Gintoki tried to comment, interrupted when Hijikata's shoe, with the spit, was rubbed clean on his yukata. "Oi! What do you think you're doing?" Gintoki yelled. "You just annoy me…" Hijikata grumbled. "What was that? This is clearly abusing of your authority! You corrupted Officer! You better have this clean, or better yet why not pay for it? This yukata's actually really expensive you know! It has memories in it too! It's very important, the price could reach more than a million and you better pay!" Gintoki exaggerated.

"What are you saying, you have four of those, and you don't take care of them nicely anyway…." Kagura added. "Eh? What are you saying Kagura-chan? Do you know where this came from, and also, you may not notice it but each yukata actually has a tiny detail of difference you know, and as it turns out, this one is the most expensive!" Gintoki kept insisting. "This is pathetic Gin-san…" Shinpachi commented. "You too, Shinpachi?" Gintoki screamed.

Having enough of the useless arguing, Hijikata joined in. "Fine, fine, I'll pay for the freaking yukata's cleaning bill, whatever… just quit your bitching, after the parade is over, I'll be free anyway…"

"Eh? Hijikata-san is it just me or have you been having a lot of free time lately, like yesterday…" Shinpachi noticed. "That's awful! Are you finally retiring, I didn't know you were that old or are you injured or has the Shinsengumi finally had enough of you and your mayonnaise-aru?" Kagura added. "The hell? That's not it! It's just Tetsu's been helping a lot… he insists on it, and so far he's been doing a good job so… I have nothing much to do…" Hijikata explained.

"So you're no longer need any more… don't worry Odd-Jobs Gin-chan would be happy to accept you as-" Gintoki tried to invite with a grin. "Like hell… stop playing me, will you?" Hijikata shouted. "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The ear destroying scream echoed all the way to where they were. "Eh? What was that…Ah! Hijikata-kun?" Gintoki yelled, seeing Hijikata already on his bike. "That might be the princess…Ah?" he explained, then he felt the bike get heavier. Gintoki jumped on as well. "Tch, Oi! Get off!" Hijikata scolded. "The princess is in trouble, would you rather scold me or- WHAA!" Gintoki tried to tease, but Hijikata had started the bike already and went full throttle to we're the floater currently was at.

"Gin-san! Hjikata-san!" Shinpachi called, ignored. "Let's go, Shinpachi!" Kagura ordered, already on top of Sadaharu. Shinpachi jumped on Sadaharu and they followed the bike.

* * *

Author: Soooo…. I decided to make it into a story. Aha! Yay, I got a review and a favourite~! Thank you soooo much~! Characters aren't mine except the princess… sorry for grammar, misused words, misspelled words, confusing… did not reread… again…till next time~! I'm so excited for this story for some reason! Oh, and rating may go up~


	3. Chapter 3

Catch 3

* * *

"KYAAAAAAAAAAA!" The princess panicked from all the way up her floater. "Princess, what's wrong?" her bodyguard asked, trying very hard to calm her down. The parade looked completely normal though. There wasn't any Joi threatening the parade or any weird people interfering with it. Hijikata and Gintoki arrived and run toward Kondo.

"Kondo-san, what's wrong?" Hijikata quickly asked, already directing his sight to where the princess was. "Toushi, well… the princess started screaming for some reason…" Kondo explained. "Nothing really happened though…" he continued. "Well, there has to be a reason… should one of us get up there?" Hijikata asked. "No… we can just one of the bodyguards, wait" Kondo ordered, he approached one bodyguard on the ground and started asking what happened to the princess.

"Maybe she's in her period… and she just realized it and now she has a huge blob of red under her skir-BUwaaah!" Gintoki wasn't able to finish, Hijikata's fist, not strong enough to hurt him but strong enough to make him shut up was on his face. "Shut up…" Hijikata glared at the man. Gintoki remained silent, but placed his own hand over the vice-chief's fist. Hijikata didn't mind it, but then Gintoki's other hand reached for Hijikata's face and pinched his cheek, hard. A vein pops on Hijikata's forehead and started to push his fist a bit stronger while grabbing Gintoki's other hand by the wrist, forcing it to release the innocent reddening cheek.

"What are those two doing?" Yamazaki asked himself, behind him, whispers and rumours had started. "The vice-chief is acting weird, right?" Yamazaki tried to join, ignored. The whispering got weirder from Hijikata and Gintoki wanting to kill each other to them having an argument on whose topping. "Topping? As in dessert toppings? I like that…" Yamazaki tried to join in again, ignored. Yamazaki finally snaps, and screams "Why aren't you letting me join? Can't you hear me? I want to talk about rumors about the vice-chief too! I have the info you know! I'm the spy you know! I can know what those two are up to as quick as I can attack you with my swirling kick you know!"

"What was that?" Gintoki and Hijikata said in sync, behind Yamazaki. And Yamazaki burst into tears. "Vice-chief! Danna! You actually notice me!" He cried, wanting to hug the two. Then they both passed him and went in front the whispering shinsengumi members. "What are you whispering about?! If you have time to chatter like the wimpy girls you are, do you ob properly!" the vice chief scolded. "I'm toppi-" Gintoki tried to assure their questions, stopped by Hijikata, kicking the man in the ass, making Gintoki fall on his knees "GUUWAA." "Shut up…" Hijikata glared, he glared back at the shinsengumi as well.

"Excuse me… are you the vice-chief Hijikata-kun?" an alien asked, one of the princess's bodyguards. Hijikata turned his attention from the Shinsengumi members and Gintoki to the guard. "Yes, that's me…" The alien gave him a long stare from head to toe, annoying the demon vice-chief. "I see… well, actually, would you mind getting rid of that human?" the alien asked pointing at an old man in the sidewalk, with the huge crowd, he was barely noticeable.

"Eh, Why?" Hijikata asked. "Actually, the princess seems to have spotted him and thinks he's utterly disgusting so she started screaming how hideous the old man was and doesn't want to continue the parade until the man is slaughtered, and we can't have that so if you'd just get rid of him…" the alien explained, angering every single human who heard him. "I… I… see… that's why…" Hijikata nearly snapped, he was gripping his sword already. "I understand…" he had to calm himself though, which annoyed him more. All the humans only glared when the alien turned his back on them and returned to his post. "KYAAAAAAAAAAA!" the princess screamed again.

"Tch, troublesome… such a pain…" Hijikata approached the old man, Gintoki and the others only watched. The civilians who heard glared at Hijikata as well. "Hey… old timer… you see-" Hijikata started, he wasn't even sure the old man could hear him since the old man didn't bother to look at him or move. "Oi… old man, grandpa, can you hear us?" Gintoki sang, he appeared right next to the old man's ear. "Eh? What is it?" The old man asked. "You see…. This officer is really sorry for dragging you here for this parade and wants to make it up to you! So… he wants to offer you a luxurious night in the girl's host club!" Gintoki lied; Hijikata only gaped while some civilians giggled. "What are you-" Hijikata tried. "Ohohohoho, I see, I see….! Well those girl's better be ready when I come ohohohoh *cough* *cough*" The old man laughed, Gintoki joining in as well. Gintoki gave the old man a letter, saying he should give it to a person named Otae-san, it says that Gintoki would pay for everything. And the old man left.

"Well… that's that…" Gintoki smiled as the old man disappeared and the screaming of the princess stopped. Wait, it stopped earlier. Hijikata approached the samurai. "Oi… I'll pay for half… tha-tha-thanks…." Hijikata stuttered and Gintoki had to resist pushing him down. "EEEh? Half? You'll pay it full! And don't forget about my yukata! It's dirtier now when you kicked me! Oh wait, why not just clean in yourself, yes, yes…" Gintoki teased. "You can do the laundry in the house, I'll be watching your every move while you bend over and squat, wearing an apron and-" Gintoki stopped when he saw the disgusted face Hijikata had "You're despicable…" Hijikata commented, after saying that though, he smiled his amazingly pure and handsome smile, Gintoki fell in love with.

"Wait a minute princess! Where are you going? You shouldn't leave the floater!" An alien's voice was heard behind Hijikata. Hijikata turned and there she was. The princess with her face covered with a pink fan was right in front of Hijikata. Hijikata was shocked at first but collected himself and bowed to the princess. He stood straight up after a few second and opened his mouth "Is something the matter, princess?"

"Accompany me above!" The princess ordered. "A…?" Hijikata was unable to talk; he looked at the bodyguard, whose faces gave a sign of just go with it. So he complied. Hijikata followed behind the princess and went on top of the huge floater. "Why? All of a sudden?" Kondo asked one of the bodyguards, appearing next to Gintoki. "It seems… that the princess has taken a liking to the vice-chief…" the bodyguard explained. "Eh? U…. hahahahahhaahah! Haha! As expected of Toushi!" Kondo laughed like it wasn't trouble at all while Gintoki only stared at the two above.

"Gin-chan! What happened?" Kagura asked, finally arriving. "Danna… you guy are here too? Ah, isn't that Hijikata-san?" Okita asked Kondo. The reason they arrived late was probably the same reason why they looked like they came from a war while Tetsu and Shinpachi dangled lifelessly behind them. They had probably started a war on the way. "Well… Toushi was able to charm the princess! Isn't that great?" Kondo said happily.

"I see…" Okita looked at Gintoki, who didn't bother to notice and only continued looking at Hijikata. "Danna… if that isn't competition, I don't know anymore…" Okita sadistically whispered to Gintoki. Gintoki only smiled. "Okita-kun, for me, a person that likes him isn't a competition it's the people he likes that are…" Gintoki said.

_This is so awkward and weird…._Hijikata thought as he sat next to the princess, who annoyingly kept glancing at him even though she covered her face all the time with the fan. _Just end already! And if you have something to say, just say it already! Clingy girls really are the worst! _He thought as he suppressed the urge to snap and hump off the floater. After an hour the parade finally ended. The aliens went away to another planet to promote theirs and their princess and the Shinsengumi returned to their dojo.

* * *

"Oi… why are you here?" Hijikata asked. "I'm waiting for you to do my laundry…" Gintoki said, lying down on the tatami and reading a jump magazine he surprisingly found in the vice-chief's room. Yes, they were inside Hjijikata's room. Hijikata had to write a written report about the parade so he was properly sitting in front of his desk with a brush, paper and ink. He looked at Gintoki and sighed.

It was quiet, only the flipping of pages was heard in the room. Every minute, Gintoki would keep changing positions, finding a comfortable one to read with. Hijikata nearly snapped at this. Eventually Gintoki found it, right next to Hijikata and using the vice-chief's thigh as a pillow. "Oi… you're clearly trying to distract me here…" Hijikata grumbled. "Hoooo… Hijikata-kun loves me so much; his mind is always full of me, distracting him, even though I'm not doing anything?" Gintoki teased. "I'll pour ink down your face…" Hijikata threatened him half-heartedly.

After a few more minutes of silence, Gintoki finally spoke "Hijikata-kun, are you done yet?" He didn't receive an answer. "Hi-Ji-Ka-Ta-Kuuuun~" Gintoki sang, bringing a hand up to Hijikata's face and stroking a cheek. Hijikata sighed and put down his brush. He placed a hand on top of Gin's hand and leaned down. He leaned enough to give the former Joi a kiss, which Gintoki whole heartedly received. _Soooo nice…sooo nice….soooo nice…._Gintoki kept repeating in this head.

Eventually, Gintoki licked Hijikata's lips, asking for access and Hijikata opened his mouth for the man. They tongues danced in a sweet loving kiss. "Mmmm…" Hijikata moaned, loving the sensation. *squeak* "Hmm?" Hijikata broke the kiss and sat up straight, upsetting Gintoki. "What was that?" Hijikata asked. "Probably just a mouse… don't worry, I asked Okita-kun to make tell the others to not disturb you or they'll have to commit seppuku~" Gintoki assured his lover, sitting up as well. He turned to face Hijikata and smirked.

Hijikata sighed; the former Joi already fixed everything up for his silly little plan, hasn't he. "You… I thought I was going to do laundry…" Hijikata asked in a teasing smile as Gintoki crawled closer him. Putting a hand on the tatami behind Hijikata and another on the vice-chief's chest, Gintoki gently pushed him down.

"Well, this involves cleaning as well, right?" Gintoki smirked and Hijikata copied. Gintoki leaned down to kiss Hijikata, who in return wrapped his arms around the man's neck, pulling him closer. They shared a passionate kiss while Gintoki's hands travelled lower to take the vice-chief's pants off, teasingly slow. "Ngghh… Mhhmmm" Hijikata moaned in their kiss, adding excitement for Gintoki.

As the two made out and nearly rubbed their bodies against each other out of lust, an eye, similar to how an old shoujo character's eye stared. He saw them break the kiss reluctantly and undress each other. After taking their tops off, Gintoki trailed kisses from Hijikata's forehead down to his most sensitively throbbing part. He saw the vice-chief's back arch and the lust filled expressions he made, the moans and each drop of sweat. He watched everything so intently while another sadistic face watched him from behind.

The peeping tom, stood up quickly and shook his head, how could the vice-chief be doing such lewd actions with the Boss? He asked himself. He strides quietly away from the room and bumps into Okita. "Ah, Tetsu, What's wrong? You look a bit pale…" Okita asked. "No… it's nothing…" Tetsu replied. "But… no way… are you hard? What a perverted kid, you were doing something naughty weren't you? You're sweating a lot too! You pig!" Okita sneered. "EH?" Tetsu looked down to check, yes, there was a bulge on his pants. "This isn't… excuse me…" Tetsu ran. Okita didn't bother looking back and sets up a camera quietly on the crack of the vice-chief's room's door. He looks into the camera to see… Gintoki glaring at the lens. Okita smirks.

_Nothing gets pass you Danna.._ Okita gave up, seeing that Gintoki moved his actions with Hijikata in the part of the room where they surely wouldn't be seen. Okita stood up and left with the camera.

* * *

Author: sorry for grammar errors, etc, didn't reread again, chars aren't mine except the princess. Is okita against or a fanboy of GinHiji….aha, thank you for the follows and favourites~ till next time~!


	4. Chapter 4

Catch 4

* * *

"Tetsu…" Hijikata called. He stared at Tetsu, who in return appeared to be staring back at the vice-commander. "Tetsu… oi…" Hijikata tried again, no response. He snapped at the lack of movement and grabbed his lighter. He calmed himself a bit after gripping the lighter and tried again. "Tetsu? Are you paying attention?" No response, so he threw the lighter hitting his assistant right in the face.

"AH! Ouch!" Tetsu finally spoke, nearly a scream. He faced Hijikata and appeared like he had just woken up from a dream. "Hi-Hijikata-san! Ah… I'm so sorry" He bowed. "…is there anything I can do for you?"

Hijikata stared at him for a minute, noticing a sweat drop from his assistant's already shiny chubby cheek. Hijikata sighed and straightened pieces of paper together and handed them to Tetsu. "Here, give this to Kondo-san and wait for me at the entrance right after… we're going out to patrol the area a bit…" He ordered. "Yes!" Tetsu complied and stood up straight after grabbing the pieces of paper. Without looking back he slides the door open, exits, bows, and slides the door close.

Hijikata only stared at how stiff his assistant was being. _What was that about?_ Hijikata then stood up and approached his closet to get ready to patrol the area. He opened his closet and took out his jacket, putting it on swiftly. He went outside his room and took out a stick of cigarette, placing it on his mouth as he grabbed his lighter. He lights it with no problem, inhaling deeply, removing the stick from his mouth and exhaling the smoke. He puts it back in his mouth right after.

While he did all those… a number of eyes were scanning him thoroughly. "…so what do you think?"

"It's impossible…"

"but if you think about it closely, has Hijikata-san ever…"

"That doesn't mean he really is…"

"but if it were true… wouldn't that be a bit…"

"I know, to think we all bathed together before…"

"don't be ridiculous, even if he were, there's no way he'd think that way toward an ugly beast like you…"

"haha… I see, nothing to be worried about, wait! What do you mean by ugly beast? You Bastard!"

"Oi, don't shout he'll hear us!"

"Ah… you shouted too!"

"You assholes, keep it quiet!"

"Wait, I think something just poked me… was that a flashlight?"

"Eh? Why? How'd it feel?"

"Hard and long… a bit thin…"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEH? OI! IS ONE OF US HAVING A BONER HERE?"

"AH-"

"What are you assholes doing?" Hijikata asked, no wonder it seemed too quiet. A group of Shinsengumi members, were hiding in the bushes outside of Hijikata's room. "ah- Hijikata-san this isn't-" One tried to explain. "Oi, oi, before that who the hell was the one who had a stiffy?" Another one shouted, scared. "Stiffy?" Hijikata asked. None of the group answered, they all just acted, stiff. "What are you-" Hijikata tried to ask. "That's it! You see, Hijikata-san, we're testing how long we can hold being stiff!" another one explained. _Yes, depending on Hijikata-san's interest in a stiffy, we'll know for sure if he really is what we think, _the member thought.

"Being stiff?" Hijikata asked again, completely confused. "Yes! You see… like how soldiers are tested how long they can take the cold… this is like that, it's like a test for being tortured too! Holding yourself back to be stiff!" The entire group tried to get out of trouble. "…riiiiight" Hijikata regretted questioning. "Well… good luck with that I guess…" Hijikata waved them goodbye. _What the hell was that about? Wait… being stiff…. Stiff like acting like a rock .Was that what Tetsu was doing earlier? _

When Hijikata left the groups' sight their knees gave up and each one of them nearly sighed their souls out. "That was close…" One muttered. "So… who had the boner?" no answer. "Seriously…?" the person who asked continued to be scared. "Hey… why would Hijikata-san go for such a weird excuse?"

"The stiffy we were mentioning was, the boner kind right? He got that right?"

"If he did, and considered it okay to practice… means…"

"…..!"

_HE WANTS TO SEE OUR STIFFYS!_ They all thought.

* * *

"Hijikata-san!" Tetsu called out, running toward the man who was waiting for him, already inside the police car. "Sorry for making you wait, the papers were all safely delivered to Kondo-san!" He reported and bowed at the same time, before entering the car in the driver's seat. "…yeah, good work" Hijikata said. "Then, commencing patrol!" Tetsu announced starting the car's engine.

Even in the car, Tetsu was completely stiff. Drops of sweat kept running down his face and he absolutely refused to look at Hijikata, even if he had to look at the side-mirror. Hijikata stared at him hard and sighed. "Tetsu… forget it…" Hijikata said, stopping the silence inside the car. Stopping the car, Tetsu thought Hijikata meant to forget about the patrol. "Is there anything wrong?" Tetsu asked, not looking at Hijikata still. "Forget about… that whole stiffy thing…" Hijikata said, still thinking that a stiffy meant acting stiff like a rock.

Tetsu looked shocked at this and looked at Hijikata for a second before adverting his eyes again quickly. "Sti- I don't have a stiffy, sir" Tetsu said. "I'm saying you should just let it go, it's just acting stiffy right? Do it later again, for now just release that mind of yours from that stiffy testing or whatever…." Hijikata said, not knowing what Tetsu understood from his words.

"Hi-Hijikata-san… I… release… my stiffy…" Tetsu couldn't believe it. "Yeah, yeah release it already…" Hijikata insisted. "I can't do it!" Tetsu declared, seriously looking at Hijikata. Hijikata looked at him with a face asking why. _Hijikata-san wants me to release my stiffy?! Even in broad daylight? Wait that isn't the problem! He wants to see my stiffy? Why? Would he compare it with the boss's stiffy? I can't match up to that! I saw it! It was huge! I had no idea how it was going to go in! And the boss's is definitely stronger than me! Hijikata-san will just laugh at me for sure! I can't show it to him knowing he had already seen one that's so amazing! _Tetsu imagined an image of Gintoki's crotch gleaming golden, while the owner had the most annoying grin in his face and a long nose while holding a love-struck Hijikata, which was making beautiful eyes at Gintoki's heavenly crotch. (Author: I want to draw this XDDDD)

"I can't do it! Unless you tell me that I have a chance and that I can be stronger than the boss then I can't!" Tetsu declared more seriously. _Unless I'm sure he'll accept me, not out of pity, not because he's a slut, wait, Hijikata-san is no slut! But it'd be pretty hot if he were… wait! Stop thinking about it or my stiffy will burst! What was I thinking about? Oh! Unless Hijikata-san can throw the Boss in the garbage or in the middle of a shark infested ocean!_ Tetsu thought, already imagining Gintoki's death.

"Tetsu… what's with that? You don't need me to tell you all that, bastard…" Hijikata said, taking the declaration seriously. _That's how serious he is about this testing? What's with that? Well, if he's that serious…. Plus what he said just now, he wants to be stronger that Gintoki… How will practicing to be stiff be helpful in getting stronger than that guy? _"If you want to be stronger than that guy… you don't have the time to think that you don't have a chance or can't do it…" Hijikata said.

"Start the car; we need to finish this the patrol…" Hijikata ended the conversation there, thinking it'd be best to leave Tetsu to think of what to do to be stronger. _Hijikata-san… _Tetsu thought, admiring the man all over again as well as envying the boss more extremely. While on patrol, Tetsu had a completely determined face.

* * *

"One Gintoki-special please!" Gintoki ordered, obviously already a regular at the small diner. "Ah! Welcome, Gin-san, one Gintoki-special coming up!" The new owner greeted, it was a relative of the previous owner who died, with an awesome funeral, and he had continued the business and chatted a lot with the shop's regulars. Eventually he got the used to everyone and nearly appeared to be the previous owner only younger.

Gintoki sat at his usually seat. He stares as the man next to him slurped up the soba into his mouth. The man chews the soba and gulps it all down. The man looks back at him. Gintoki smirks. "You have something on your face…" Gintoki mentioned, even though there was nothing. He lifts up his hand to the person's face, Gintoki's finger rubbed against the side of the man's mouth. Gintoki had the urge to put his finger inside those lips but was able to retreat his hand, reluctantly. "I don't think there was anything in my face, but thanks…" Hijikata said, seemed like he wasn't bothered by the show, there weren't many people there and the owner was in the kitchen.

"Eh? There really was something, you really are messy when you eat… like letting it trail down from your lips even when I say you have to swallow all of it…" Gintoki teased. Hijikata, knowing full well what the other was thinking, continued eating, faster. "Ah.. Hijikata-kun? You'll choke if you-" Gintoki tried to stop him, but it was too late. "Owner! Thanks for today; I'll leave my pay here… then…" Hijikata placed the money on the table and stood up. "Ah! Thanks again for coming, Hijikata-san" the owner said, popping out of the kitchen.

"Hi-Hijikata-kun? Wait…" Gintoki said in a panic, standing up as well. "What?" Hijikata asked, Gintoki had blocked his way toward the exit anyway. "…no dessert?" Gintoki asked, smirking with furrowed eyebrows. Hijikata sighed. "Well… I want to but… It might turn me messy… right?" Hijikata said, trying to make Gintoki feel a bit guilty for teasing him, he always teased him. _No… wait, turn me messy…?_ Hijikata thought. Hijikata realized how Gintoki would understand what he said and looked at Gintoki. He looked shocked as well.

_He would turn messy… that could mean a lot of things, but… but the kind of messy Hijikata… one covered in… and completely engrossed in… losing himself so much… the dessert being… _Gintoki thought, a trickle of blood appearing from him nose. Hijikata saw it and panicked. "Wait! That's not it! There's no way I'd be mes- no, wait… I'm not a mes-… I don't… Ugh… I mean dessert right? Ice cream, cream puffs, whip cream… wait…ah…" Hijikata tried hard, he knew his lover would lose it if Hijikata were to show any small signs that he wanted 'IT'. _HE WANTS A CREAMY DESSERT! _Gintoki already had a perfect picture in his mind.

"Sorry! Owner, I have to go now!" Gintoki shouted and grabbed Hijikata by the wrist, rushing out. "Wait! Oi!" Hijikata tried. "Geez… Toushiro… even in front of a lot of people you still love acting like a complete tease…" Gintoki said walking fast toward their usual motel. "Me? A tease? You're the tease!" Hijikata argued. "See? You're being a tease now, damn you tsunderes… You seeing me as a tease is like, you getting affected by everything I do, even though you don't show it! You're more of a tease!" Gintoki replied. They entered the motel and took the familiar room.

"Wa-wait! This author can't write smut yet!" Hijikata protested. "…WHAAAAT? Crappy author this is what the readers want you know! And haven't you already read and watched and reread and rewatched a heck lot of yaoi porn? Don't act all innocent now damn it!" Gintoki yelled.

"Wait- Ah!" Hijikata felt the hands already freeing him off his clothes. "See? You can do it…" Gintoki smirked as he removed everything that was covering Hijikata's luscious body. "Ngggh…" Hijikata moaned. Throwing the clothes in the floor and admiring the sight of Hijikata, completely naked below him, Gintoki leaned down to kiss his meal in the lips as he undressed himself, gaining assistance as Hijikata unbuckled the man's belt. Gintoki smirks from the action. They both moaned as their tongues started a dance for dominance, both wanting to explore the others mouth.

Gintoki unwillingly broke the kiss to take off his top. As Gintoki stretched his hands up to take it off, Hijikata sat up enough to kiss the man's chest, seeing Gintoki's already unzipped pants, Hijikata leans toward it. He takes the opportunity to free Gintoki's throbbing cock.

* * *

"Hey, Shinpachi, why are we in this chapter?" Kagura asked. "Well, the author wouldn't be able to finish this if she continued with the smut, she kept face palming and cringing after the **** part" Shinpachi explained. "I see… what a weak author…" Kagura commented.

*knock* *knock* "Excuse me… Kin-san? Are you there?" a familiar voice called out.

* * *

Author: …..sorry, but definitely….. before this ends I will…. Definitely somehow…. Somehow…. My fingers are soooooo cold right now…. Why …why ….why rnlrlkewjwklejklwe hope you enjoyed, chars. Aren't mine…. Till next time, thanks for faves, follows, reviews~ thanks that you think it's interesting, here's the 4rth chapter, and once my hand recovers I shall probably continue with next chapter, that's how excited I am for this aha… okay.. sorry again~


	5. Chapter 5

Catch 5

* * *

Gintoki walked lazily on his way home, nearly looking drunk, he leans on a light post and sighed. It was the middle of the night, right after he and Hinjikata finished their _dessert_, they cuddled a bit but eventually, Hijikata started cleaning himself up. _"Don't look at me like that, those brats would be worried too if you didn't come home…" _Gintoki remembered what Hijikata said before leaving. As much as Hijikata's reason for not sleeping together was true, Gintoki still wanted to spend more time with him.

_Geez… that guy… I feel like a fuck buddy whenever he does that… _Gintoki sighed again and continued walking more lazily. _But then again… he was really cute today~ Ah, no… I shouldn't keep thinking of him, I'll have the urge to sneak in his room again… then he'll be mad, but then he'll forgive me and then we'll end up… no no no no no … gotta force myself to stop thinking about my adorable Toushiro… I can't show up in front of the brats with a boner after all ahaha… but really… Toushiro was soooo cute tonight~_ Gintoki continued his thoughts as he went up the stairs to his office.

He slides the door open and enters. "Gin-chan's home! Why are the lights still on? Kagura-chan should be sleeping abou-" Gintoki walked as he announced his arrival, when he reached the main room he stopped talking. "Kintoki! It's been a while! Ahaha Ahaha Ahaha haha ha!" Sakamoto greeted, he stood up from the sofa and approached his friend. "Sakamoto! And is Gintoki by the way, GINtoki… don't remind me of Kintoki please…" Gintoki said.

"Ahaha! You're the same as always, Kintoki!" Sakamoto said like he didn't he hear the other. "Ahaha! You too! You're the same annoying guy as well Ahahaha! It's GINtoki!" Gintoki said, a vein popping in his forehead as he forced his laugh. "Geez… Gin-san, why are you home so late? You said you'd just go out to dinner, you left Kagura-chan alone so I couldn't go home you know… " Shinpachi mentioned. "Yeah! You left me here to starve you worthless adult! Hurry up and feed me!" Kagura added, as bold as ever. "You just ate didn't you? I made you food, didn't I?" Shinpachi reminded, ignored. "Hurry up with the food!" Kagura ordered.

"You brat? I'm not feeding you anymore; Shinpachi already gave you some, right? And it's the middle of the night; you'll get fat like last time if you eat at night you know!" Gintoki scolded the girl. "Eh? Actually I haven't eaten anything! Ahahaha!" Sakamoto joined in. After that Sakamoto's tummy grumbling was heard in the room. "Yaaay! That's right! It's been a while since you last saw your junior, right? We should celebrate! We should eat-aru!" Kagura cheered. "You only want to eat again…" Shinpachi commented.

"What's with you? Why are you here anyway? Why am I asking it just now? You know I still think that the reason you appeared in the memory loss arc was to make it look like Kagura and Shinpachi had no place to go back to you know!" Gintoki yelled, to think he was so giddy just earlier. "Ah! We can discuss that while eating! While drinking! Don't you love to drink, Kintoki? Let's drink and eat and drink!" Sakamoto cheered, already pushing Gintoki inside his own kitchen.

"Oi! Don't tell me your just here to eat! Did your business fail? Are you homeless now? That's it, isn't it? Where's that girl you're always with anyway? Oi? Are you listening to me?" Gintoki continued to protest but eventually all of it was ignored. In the end, he cooked for the group.

"It's done… ah-" Gintoki's sight grew dark… at the room was, Otae-san. "Shin-chan didn't come home, so I went here! And then I met Oryo-chan on the way and she accompanied me to pick up Shin-chan." She looked over to where her friend was, Oryo-chan, who was currently kicking Sakamoto's face away, who in return just laughed and continued trying to push himself against the girl. "Geez! Gin-san, why didn't you say you were having a celebration? Oh well… it's good that I brought some snacks!" Otae opened up the container, in it was… normal looking rice cakes.

"Eh?" Gintoki shocked, stares at thing. Was that really Otae-san's? "Nee-san? Did you? Where did those?" Shinpachi asked. "Big sis! No way! You can finally cook edible food? Or maybe it's just the outside-aru" Kagura said. "My my, what are you saying Kagura-chan? But I didn't make these… these were left by gori… I didn't know what was in it, and so since I was going here, why not give it to Gin-san?" Otae smiled. _Something's wrong with this woman! What did Kondo-san see in this demon girl? Am I taste, no, poison tester? You're already treating me like trash now you want me dead? I don't want to eat those!_ Gintoki thought.

"Now then, here… Gin-san" Otae smiled, Gitoki swore he saw a demon mask behind the woman. Kagura and Shinpachi ignored the adults, apparently by age, and ate the food Gintoki made with Sadaharu. Sakamoto was being beaten to a pulp by Oryo, he wasn't even able to touch the food prepared for him or Oryo, while Gintoki… was forced to eat the rice cakes, which was luckily, normal, though Kondo-san was a stalker, he would never try to poison Otae-san…right?

* * *

"Welcom-" Kondo tried to greet the visitors, but being forced out of his bed in the middle of the night, he yawned. "Ah- I'm very sorry! I'm the Shinsengumi Chief, Kondo Isao, It's very nice to meet you! Can we do anything for you?" Kondo immediately apologized. "Before that, explain why you're here in the middle of the night without even announcing your arrival… Kaientai" Okita appeared to order, looking sceptical toward Mutsu.

Hijikata was in his room, already asleep. No one wanted to wake him up after the whole _stiffy_ misunderstanding. When the Shinsengumi members asked Okita about it, Okita simply smirked and teased them that they had were interested cause they wanted to try the vice-chief. Each one of them argued that they didn't eventually giving up on getting information from Okita. After that, they had a rather worthless but taken really serious discussion on how to find out if the rumors about Hijikata were true and how to act around him if it were.

"I apologize about the sudden arrival… as you know we are from Kaientai and we would like to do business with the Shinsengumi" Mutsu said, not fazed by Okita's stare. She barely looked at him and concentrated on the chief. _This is the Shinsengumi Chief? I heard he was a good and great man, but doesn't he look a bit useless? _Mutsu stared as Kondo's eyelids seem to be getting heavier and heavier by the second. _I admit it is time to be asleep but… this is the chief, right? What would he do if there was an emergency? Seriously… are most captains supposed to look useless all the time? The guy next to him… the vice-chief? So this is the vice-chief…._ She only looked at Okita at the side, not adverting her eyes from Kondo.

"Kondo-san, we would like to make a deal…" Mutsu said. "What kind of deal?" Okita was the one that answered not giving Kondo-san the chance, since he appeared to be already asleep, a bubble snot appearing from his nose. "Unfortunately we have only little information in what the Shinsengumi needs, it could be weapons or machines perhaps even more men or women, so we have yet to come up with something to trade with you but there is something that you have that we want" Mutsu explained, finally looking at Okita, no longer wanting to poison her eyes with Kondo. "And what is that?" Okita asked. "You…" Mutsu finished.

"Me…? Why would you want me?" Okita asked, seriously taken by surprise. "You're the vice-chief aren't you? We want to trade you to another planet, as simple as that, in return you're comrades will receive a fair trade of what you're worth to them… " Mutsu said. "The vice-chief?" Okita muttered, not loud enough for Mutsu to hear. "Who would you trade me too, exactly? Someone who wants me?" _Is it any enemy of the Shinsengumi? Of the Shogun? _Okita thought. "The princess of Quaforve, the one that had a parade her recently" She answered.

Okita smirked at his, and felt Mutsu notice something off with that smirk. _Crap… she's sharp_ "I see…" Okita immediately calmed his sadistic smile. "That spoiled princess… I understand…" Okita said. "But unfortunately it isn't me, the one you want…" Okita revealed for Mutsu. "What do you mean? Aren't you the vice-chief?" Mutsu asked. _I got it wrong? Then who is this person and what was with that smirk? Is he planning something… it might be troublesome to get involved with this one_

"I'm not the vice-chief… he's… out right now, you can come back tomorrow and discuss it with him…" Okita informed Mutsu. "I understand…"

* * *

"The princess wants a person from earth?" Gintoki screamed. He and Sakamoto headed to the rooftop to drink while the others had gone to sleep. "Yeah! It's actually a great deal! All we have to do is kidnap the guy and give him to the princess and the princess makes business with us! Isn't it easy and nice! Ahaha" Sakamoto laughed, earning himself a scolding from a neighbour. "That's why you're in earth; Mutsu is looking for the guy now?" Gintoki asked, taking another sip. "Yes, I wonder how it went…" Sakamoto looked up the sky and rested his back and head on the roof, Gintoki copied. "You see… the guy is kind of important, I guess… like in a position… and you know… it might be a big deal if we take him by legal means ahahaha!" Sakamoto said.

"So if they don't comply with you guys you'll kidnap him?" Gitoki asked. "That, I really don't want o happen! It'll be troublesome ahaha! But then… that princess seemed to be really in love with the guy ahaha!" Sakamoto continued. "She's spoiled, she already left a bad impression when she came here you know! No way will that guy accept being taken to the princess and be used as some sex doll, or whatever that princess wants to do with him…" Gintoki said, nearly drunk.

"Yeah…. But you know, maybe if he'd meet her then it'd be okay! Who knows he might cure the princess's spoiled attitude ahahaha! Plus it'd be good for the earth and her planet to make piece, it'd be an awesome chance! Ahaha! I think I'll start with giving them a chance to meet!" Sakamoto said, wanting to end it with no kidnapping involved. "Haha… so you're going to play cupid?" Gintoki smiled at this.

"Yeah! Ahahaha! I hope Mutsu doesn't do anything drastic though…." Sakamoto remembered that she let Mutsu handle it. "Hmmm.. maybe I'll go there now… who knows what Mutsu's saying to them… ahahaha, but it'll be okay! Kintoki will help if I get into trouble! I'll just give you to the princess instead!" Sakamoto chuckled. "Like hell I'd agree to that! You're not trading me off again with some alien!" Gintoki said. "Eh? What's this? Kintoki not wanting the chance to meet a girl?" Sakamoto teased.

"A spoiled girl! And an alien! Who knows what she looks like! She didn't show her face in the parade! She must be butt ugly!" Gintoki argued. "I feel sorry for the guy she's set her eyes on… who is the guy anyway?" Gintoki finally asked. "Ah… Shinsengumi's-" Sakamoto started, this made Gintoki sit up. _At the parade… the princess made…._

"-Vice-commander" Sakamoto finished. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH? NOOOOOOO WAAAAAAAAAY! " Gintoki screamed, eventually getting a bunch of neighbours angry and making them throw all the stuff they can find at him.

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Author: I wanted to continue… but it had to end there aha! Thanks for reading down to here, sorry for errors, didn't reread… chars aren't mine~ till next chapter~


	6. Chapter 6

Catch 6

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_This is bad_

_This is bad_

_This is bad_

"What do you say Kintoki? Will you help me out?-" Sakamoto asked.

_This is bad_

_This is bad_

"Ahahaha! Of course you would! Ahahaha!" he answered for him.

"Well… you know… well… that vice-commander isn't really all that good you know! This is a really bad idea you know! Couldn't you provide something better for the princess? There's no way she'd like him, she'd hate him more! She'd hate earth more! Who knows what could happen! The vice-commander is extremely rude you know! He's all looks and craziness! He has a really bad reputation you know!" Gintoki tried, ignoring the yells he received from his neighbours.

"Ahaha! That'd be perfect! Ahaha! If they fall for each other maybe they'd both have a change in heart! Ahaha" Sakamoto ignored the neighbours as well, bending backwards while he laughed as a vase was thrown at him, successfully dodging it. Gintoki didn't notice and was hit by the vase. "Ahaha!" Sakamoto continued to laugh; he stood straight and looked at Gintoki whose head was now bleeding with a piece of the broken vase stuck to his forehead. "Sakamoto… The vice-commander of the shinsengumi… you can't…" Gintoki tried, his eyes covered in red as he stared at the man.

"He… Hijikata-kun is… my…" Gintoki tried to say. "Eh? What are you saying, Kintoki? Your voice is getting kinda distant! Ahaaha… actually I kinda feel dizzy ahaha! Is this the alcohol?" Sakamoto said, not realising that he already had a huge basin on top of his head. The basin fell from his head with a loud bang and the neighbour who threw it huffed and closed his window. The other neighbours calmed down as they saw one of the figures on top of Gintoki's apartment fall down, it was Sakamoto. "Ahaha…" Sakamoto said before losing consciousness. Gintoki stared at the fallen comrade, blood still gushing from his forehead. "…Hijikata-kun…Toushiro… is my… mine" Gintoki was able to finish before falling down as well.

Sakamoto loss consciousness with his upper body on one side of the roof and his lower at the other side, so he was safe not to slide down the roof while, Gintoki could only stare at his sleeping idiotic face, as he himself slid down and fell to the balcony of his own home with a loud crash. _This is really bad…_

* * *

"Oi! Yorozuya! Yoruzuya-bastard!"

_This voice… This specially rude way of calling the amazing Gin-chan…_

"Oi…. Yo-…"

_Hijikata-kun?_

"…Gintoki!"

In less than a second, Gintoki sat up quickly and faced the man who was calling him. He stared at him at first, noticing they were both in Hijikata's room with the sun already setting outside. "Tch! You gave me a scare there! What are you doing here?" Hijikata asked, he was still wearing a yukata he used for sleeping and the futon was still lying behind him, he just woke up. "Ah… Why am I here….? How did I even get here?" Gintoki asked himself bringing a hand up his head and feeling it was wet. "Eh?" He brought his hand to his face and saw blood. Half of his face darkened as he looked at Hijikata again. "Tou-Toushiro-kun… This is red juice isn't it? Did you accidentally spill juice on my head? And was it on a cup and fell on my head, which is why it hurts a bit? Or… was I actually resting on your lap and this is your perio-GUWAH!" his tease was stopped as Hijikata's palm connected with his cheek with a loud slapping sound.

"Don't be stupid! That's your blood! Sit still…. I'll patch you up…" Hijikata scolded he stood up and dragged Gintoki by the shoulders to his futon and went to his cabinet for bandages. "…right after, you have to explain to me why you're here and why you're injured!" Hijikata scolded not looking back at Gintoki and focusing on looking for the bandages. _That stupid perm asshole… Making me worry like that!_ Hijikata's rummaging in his cabinet became louder, Gintoki flinched. _Damn it… I nearly had a heart attack! Waking up from my mayonnaise land dream and what's the first thing I see? His freaking bloody hand right in front of me! _*THUD!* Hijikata unconsciously kicked his cabinet, it cracked a bit. Gintoki flinched and felt the need to escape, noticing the aura of death around his loved.

_Damn it… Damn it… Damn him…_ Hijikata failed to notice what he was doing now; he had the medicine kit on his hand and could return next to Gintoki but stayed standing and cursing in front of his poor cabinet, already receiving multiple kicks. "Hi-Hijikata-kun! Won't you please stop that? That inanimate object had nothing to do with this! I feel sorry for it! I swear I can see tears running down its eyes if it had any!" Gintoki tried to calm his lover down. Hijikata turns around to face Gintoki, glaring at him. A drop of a mixture of blood and sweat trailed down Gintoki's cheek as he approached, he swore he could see hell inside those blue orbs he loved so much.

Hijikata sat down next to Gintoki, he sighed as he placed the medicine kit at his right, trying to calm himself. "Um… Hiji-…Toushiro?" Gintoki tried to call, nervous. "What is it?" Hijikata replied normally already opening the kit and bringing out bandages. "No… That is… I really have no idea as to how I was able to get here… but I do know how I got injured!" Gintoki said. "I see…" Hijikata answered nonchalantly, placing a hand on the back of Gintoki's head and wiping the blood from his forehead. "Yes, yes! It was really nothing big! I just got hit by a vase by my neighbour! Ahaha… funny isn't it!" Gintoki explained and tried to fix the mood.

"Why would your neighbour throw a vase at you?" Hijikat asked, continuing his wiping, now gentler. "Well… I was drinking with a friend at my home's rooftop… and things… we got a little noisy" Gintoki said, leaning a bit to the wiping hand. "…well, I guess you deserved that" Hijikata said, finally calming down. "Aha… I guess! But you know… I wouldn't really mind getting injured more if I get to have Toushiro fix me up right after!" Gintoki smiled and the wiping became extremely rougher. "FUwgauh~ Two-Stwofhss!" Gintoki tried to ask what Hijikata was doing. "You! I was really worried you know! Don't say stuff like that!" Hijikata said, wiping more harshly.

"Vice-chief!" A voice behind Hijikata's doors called. "Hmm? What is it" Hijikata asked, stopping the wiping. "Are you alright?! There's a trail of blood leading to your room!" The officer behind the door said, the voice sounded familiar but the body doesn't seem to belong to that person with that voice. "It's nothing! Just a stray… dog… I'm taking care of it now, clean that up before I finish here!" Hijikata ordered. "Dog? Ah- Yes, vice-chief!" The subordinate complied.

"Was that-" Gintoki asked, peeking from Hijikata's hand and the bloody cloth. "I don't know…" Hijikata said. He finished wiping the blood and started bandaging Gintoki's head. Gintoki could only sit still and stare at Hijikata's jaw line, neck, and a bit of the upper chest as it went nearer his face for Hijikata to bandage his head. Hijikata was still wearing his yukata from bed, exposing his collar bones. _How did I end up here… ah… this is bad… Kagura-chan and Shinpachi-kun must be worried about me...but… with this breakfast in front of him how can I go home? They'd be fine right? They wouldn't worry about me…. I can stay for a while… can't I… oh…. Right, we had visitors… sakamoto…why was he here agai-…._ _I NEARLY FORGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! _Gintoki screamed inwardly, sweat dripping from his forehead to his chin like the drops were racing.

"Hmm? Yoro-…Gi-nto-ki?" Hijikata called, shyly and not facing the other, a hint of red in his cheeks. _I possibly go back now!_ Gintoki screamed in his head again, as if a lighting flash struck right behind him. "Toushiro…" Gintoki said in a low cunning voice, Hijikata flinched and speeded the way he wrapped the bandage around Gintoki's head. "Ah… Toushiro?" Gintoki called out, as Hijikata nearly made a bee hive like hat on Gintoki. "Eh? Ah…sorry" Hijikata stopped and sat straight, adding distance between them.

"Toushiro… There's something I have to ask you" Gintoki said, his current appearance, like a man from India with the bee hive hat (I have no idea what that's called sorry…) "It might have something to do with why I unconsciously and desperately tried to reach you in the middle of the night!" Gintoki said. _Yes! That must be why I'm here! After Sakamoto said I became so afraid of losing my Toushiro that I crawled all the way here! That's how important this man is for me! That has to be it! Way to go unconscious body of mine! Even without a soul my body yearns for my Toushirou! Definitely when I become a zombie Toushirou would be the first and one and only person I'd bite!_ Gintoki concluded.

"That how much I'm scared to lose you, Toushiro. When I thought about losing you, it could be that I crawled all the way just to be with you!" Gintoki declared, seriously looking into the others eyes. "This is our destiny… even our bodies our meant to die in the same place at the same time, our souls would remain together… they'd be reborn and still be together!" Gintoki continued. "Gintoki…" Hijikata said, seemingly admiring what the other was saying.

"So… Toushiro, my one and only… let's…elope and have many kid-FUWAHA!" Gintoki tried to declare, a fist connected to his chin. "What crap are you saying, you bastard?" Hijikata growled, a vein popping out of his head. He stood up and looked down on Gintoki, who was busy rubbing his reddening chin. "Who the hell would want to elope with a person who has a hole in his wallet? Stop dreaming!" Toushiro shouted. Gintoki kneeled in front of Hijikata now, faking tears in the end of his eyes. "That's mean Toushiro! Why are you saying that? Is it the money? Is money the only thing you need from me? What do you mean stop dreaming? It's not going to be just a dream! We can actually make it reality you know! This is like a proposal already you know! Any man would cry if you reject them like that you know!" Gintoki yelled, clutching the man's yukata.

"Shut up! What's impossible is impossible!" Hijikata said, he turned away from looking at Gintoki and covered half of his face with his hand in a fist, shaking. "….I ….I ….I can't have kids… asshole" Hijikata said, to the eyes of Gintoki, in the most adorable way he could. "THAT ISN'T A PROBLEM! That's actually a good thing you know! Kids are really troublesome you know! I really hate kids! Who needs kids! My life is completely complete with only you! Toushiro, I really, really, really, love yo-GUWAAH!" Gintoki yelled, nearly jumping the man, but was thrown to the other side of the room. "Go home already!" Hijikata yelled.

"No! No-GWAAAAAH!" Gintoki fell on his face as he felt a kick from behind. "Ah-" Hijikata looked up behind Gintoki. "Vice-chief… sorry to disturb your lovey dovey moment but someone has come to speak with you" OKita nearly sang, he had opened the door open and kicked Ginoki's butt to show himself to Hijikata. "Someone? I understand, I'll meet them in a minute…" Hijikata said, he picked up Gintoki by the back of the collar and threw him out the room and closed the door.

"Danna?" Okita called the unmoving body. "What will you do, Danna?" Okita asked. Gintoki didn't respond. Okita sighed and went nearer the man. "Well… I'm sorry Danna, but you ought to be going back to your place now…" Okita said, he held his sheathed sword in the air and slid it on Gintoki's belt. He lifted Gintoki that way and walked nonchalantly to throw him out. "What are you doing? Why are you carrying me out this way? How disgusting do you think I am, huh? You little! Don't want to touch me? Don't think you deserve to touch the mighty and godly meat of Gin-sama?" Gintoki yelled and complained the whole way to the gate of the Shinsengumi. Once they reached the huge doors and Gintoki landing on his face again, Gintoki glared at Okita. "Oi! I'm not just going to go, you know! I won't let them take Toushiro!" Gintoki declared and stood up. "You don't want to give Toushiro to that alien as well, do you?"

"Don't worry, Danna, we won't give them Hijikata-san… now please leave…" Okita said as he closed the huge doors. "Oi! Wait!" Gintoki tried to reach and open the gate; unfortunately Okita had added multiple huge locks on the gate for keeping it close. Gintoki tried to open it with all his strength but gave up. He went over the fence and had an arrow show directly between his legs, mere centimetres below his crotch. Gintoki's face turned blue and looked at Okita who was at the door, it was open. "Please leave…." Okita grinned in his usual sadistic manner as Gintoki gave up and exited through the door again.

_Damn that brat…. He was completely ready wasn't he… damn it… ah wait… Sakamoto! I could still convince Sakamoto to give up on Toushiro! _Gintoki realized and headed straight home in a rush.

* * *

Reaching Otose's Snack bar and not paying attention as Tama waved hello to him, he went up the stairs quickly and slid the doors open. "Sakamoto! Sakamoto! Sakamoto! You still here?" Gintoki called out. "Gin-chan? You're so noisy! It's too early to be noisy-aru!" Kagura scolded like she owned the house. "Ah Who cares if I'm noisy! Where the hell is Sakamoto?" Gintoki screamed he went pass Kagura and looked through all the rooms, in the main room, in his bedroom, in the closets, in the kitchen, in the bathroom, under the table, under the pillows, inside the toilet bowl, inside Sadaharu's mouth and inside Kagura's mouth, no Sakamoto was found. "Gin-chan?" Kagura called, noticing the samurai's desperate face, it was the face of gloom.

"Hmm… I think Sakamoto mentioned something about going to the Shinsengumi guys and leaving earth with one of them before he left…" Kagura said. "Eh?" Gintoki asked, baffled. "Yeah! He said we could come with too! He said we should tour the universe too-aru! I want to go, Gin-chan" Kagura said. "We'll go! We'll go!" Gintoki declared seriously. "Yay! Let's get ready-aru!" Kagura cheered. "I'll go get Shinpachi!" Kagura said, climbing on Sadaharu and taking off like a rocket to pick up Shinpachi. "Yeah!" Gintoki said. _Ah… wait…_"Wait! Kagura-chan, wait! I don't know where we're going to meet up with Sakamoto yet! Wait! KAAAAAAA-GUUUU-RAAAAAAA-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" Gintoki yelled, chasing after the two and once again not noticing as Tama's hand waved them goodbye.

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Author: Chapter 6~ Thanks for all the follows~ glad you enjoy it enough to follow~!


	7. Chapter 7

Catch 7

* * *

"Ahaha! Aha! Geez… Mutsu, you didn't need to be so aggressive, but I guess it is for earth, so the shinsengumi would understand! Ahaha! I hope the letter you left was sweet! Ahaha!" Sakamoto said with his usual tone. "I didn't kidnap him, when I was to meet him, he was already tied up and that Okita Sougo, said to just take him with us…" Mutsu explained, remembering the serene look on Okita's face as he handed him the tied up vice-chief. "Eh? Ahaha! Isn't that convenient!" Sakamoto said, he looked at the tied up man, he had his hand behind him and a pillow case covering his face. "Hmm! Mhfdsjj!" the vice-chief tried to speak, wiggling his body and desperately trying to untie himself, he was in his knees at the moment being held up by some of Mutsu's underlings.

"Oh! Don't worry, don't worry! We'll bring you back right away after meeting the princess. Who knows, you might end up falling for her! Sure she's a bit spoiled but she's a princess you know, aren't all?" Sakamoto tried to calm the man. The vice-chief continued struggling with the ropes that were tying his hands. "Ahaha!" Sakamoto laughs, crouching down. "Hnnng" the moment the man felt that the leader of his kidnappers was right in front of him, he bends forward, head butting Sakamoto. "OUCH!" Sakamoto screamed in pain.

Mutsu's underling then pin the man down with their knees on his back. "Ahh~ ahaha! That hurt!" Sakamoto rubbed his forehead and stood back up. Mutsu sighs, "We should have him caged just in case…"

"Now, now, there's no need to go that far Mutsu, aha" he tried. "Find a cage for him and put him in the ship, we'll be leaving soon" Mutsu orders the others and they nod in response. "Ah- wait, we have to wait for Kintoki and the others, I promised I'd let them come with us if they wanted!" Sakamoto informed Mutsu, who sighs again. "Fine… just don't let the vice-chief escape…"

* * *

''Sougo? Have you seen Toshi?" Kondo asked, sliding the door open to Okita's room. Okita stares at him for a moment before smiling and saying "No…" "That's weird; he wasn't in his room either…" Kondo said worried. "Kondo-san, this is Hijikata-san we're talking about, I'm sure he'll be alright!" Okita assured his commander. "Well… if you say so, come to think of it, I haven't seen Tetsu either…"

"We'll… their probably together on a patrol or something…" Okita said.

* * *

"That's weird; they're awfully late… well maybe they didn't want to come with us after all ahaha!" Sakamoto said, forgetting the idea to take Gintoki and his gang with him. "Should we leave then?" Mutsu asked. "Yeah! Can't let the princess wait too much!" Sakamoto permitted. "Understood, everyone-" Mutsu started but was interrupted at the sudden crash they heard. "SAKAMOTO-KUUUN!" Gintoki screamed, appearing on his scooter with Sadaharu, Kagura, and Shinpachi behind him.

"Oh! They came! They came!" Sakamoto yelled, but the ship had already started levitating, getting ready to head to space. "They're too late… we can't stop the ship now… they can come with us next time…" Mutsu said, looking at the distance of the ship and Gintoki's group. "No.. no.. this is Kintoki ahaha! Plus, look at his face! He really wants to come with! He's flaring up! Ahaha!" Sakamoto said.

Mutsu sighs "As showy as ever…". "Ah… OOOH!" Sakamoto cheered as he saw Gintko jump from his scooter screaming "SAKAMOTO!" Immediately, Sakamoto drops a long rope, tied to the ship. "Kintoko!" Gintoki grabs the rope and smirks. His smirks disappears though once he felt blood trail down his face and teeth sunk in his skull, Sadaharu had bitten his head. "Yay! Way to go Sadaharu!" Kagura praised the pet. "This is some way of getting on the ship I guess… Are you alright, Gin-san?" Shinpachi asked.

"Well, now I'm pretty sure the three of you could easily reach for the rope, so can you please make Sadaharu let go of my head?!" Gintoki scolded. "Ahaha! Kintoko you came!" Sakamoto yelled from above them. "Ah, Sakamoto-san! Please pull us up!" Shinpachi asked. "Ah, right! Right!" Sakamoto said, they had to hurry, the ship was already about to launch.

The first one to put his foot on the deck was Kagura, jumping off of Sadaharu, next was Shinpachi, helped by one of the crew. Sadaharu finally released Gintoki's head and jumped on deck as well. "Now, Kin-" Sakamoto tried to call, unfortunately he was forced to stop as a fist connected to his face. "Gin-san! What are you doing?" Shinpachi and Kagura yelled, Gintoki ignored them. "Oi, Sakamoto, where's the Shinsengumi's Vice Commander?" Gintoki asked, a demonic aura surrounding him.

"Hnng, mnnh…" The tied up vice-commander continued to untie himself, he was left in his cage in the storage room. He hears the doors creek and he immediately stops his movements. "Oi.." he hears he whisper, the familiar voice. "Toushiro… I came for you…" Gintoki whispered, approaching the cage. The tied up man stilled himself as he heard the footsteps coming closer. "Listen, I know you want to get out of here as soon as possible but…" Gintoki started, sitting down the floor, in front of the cage.

"…you know all you have to do is reject the princess in a nice way" Gintoki said, after a long talk with Mutsu and Sakamoto, the two was able to convince Gintoki to let the plan continue. "…these guys just wants you to meet the princess, and are hoping you'd fall for the girl and bring peace to earth and their planet… but we know that's impossible, right?" Gintoki smiled at the tied up man, how interesting it would be if he could take him in that position. "…since, you already have me" Gintoki said, in a loving whisper.

"…" the body was silent, only listening not wanting to act. "…Toushiro, I'll stay right here with you till we reach the planet, hope you don't mind, I wouldn't mind going in that cage of yours with you but I doubt Sakamoto or Mutsu would let me…" Gintoki chuckled, thinking of such a kinky play. "Mmmnngg" he hears the muffled words unable to tell what the vice-commander said. "Ahaha, I'll just take it that you said I'm a perverted asshole as always…" Gintoki laughed, a bit happy the vice-chief finally tried to respond.

"…this is actually kind of nice, I can talk all I want, and you have no choice but to sit still and listen!" Gintoki said. "Well… why not be a good boy and let me tell you exactly how much I'm addicted to you…" Gintoki chuckled when he saw the vice-chief's body jolt. "You have to listen carefully… Toushiro-kun"

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Author: Chapter is shorter than usual, sorry about that, sorry for errors thanks for reading down to here! Reviews and flames are loved~ Hope you readers enjoyed! Next chapter will be about how GinHiji got together~!


	8. Chapter 8

Catch 8

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"Ah! Yorozuya! Fancy meeting you here!" Kondo greeted as he approached the silver haired man. Behind both of them were the usual; behind Kondo were Hijikata and Okita, while Gintoki had Shinpachi and Kagura who was already glaring at Okita behind him. "We're here for a job actually... you guys wouldn't so happen to be here for job as well?" Gintoki asked, his eyes already twitching. _This is bad, this is our first job after a while and it was really hard to get and then these guys shows up all of a sudden, they're either competition or trouble… no, definitely trouble…_ "Yes! We were assigned to take care of the security of the place, what about you guys? Job?" Kondo asked and confirmed Gintoki. "yeah… we were asked to help with the extermination actually…" Gintoki said. _Lucky, they don't have the same job as ours but, security?_

"Extermination of what?" Hijikata asked, looking straight at Gintoki. Gintoki looked away from the man and spoke. "Extermination of the rats…"

"…Eh? Then…" Kondo started, Okita continued for him. "This is a battle… since… we were assigned to secure the rats' safety" Okita smirked while Hijikata sighed and a sweat dropped from Kond's cheek. "Is that so… then… more the reason to kill you-aru!" Kagura shouted already bringing her parasol up and pointing it toward Okita. "hmph, we'll see who kills who" Okita smirked and gripped his sword ready to unsheathe it. "Wait.. Sougo…" Kondo tried to stop him, ignored. "Kagura-chan… calm down" Shinpachi tried, ignored as well.

Kagura and Okita both released their battle cries and charged at the other. They broke the walls and disappeared outside where they continued their fight. Kondo and Shinpachi ran out to stop them. Gintoki was about to leave, no longer interested in what was going on. _Well, there goes another chance for money, well, the offer wasn't much anyway and it's definitely not worth it if I have to go against-_ Gintoki stopped his thoughts as soon as he noticed a stare.

Hijikata was staring at him. _Why the hell is this guy staring…_ So he stared back.

They spent a few seconds staring at each other, slowly turning to glares. After a minute, they both looked at a different direction and cursed.

_I really hate that guy…_ Hijikata thought, he never did care for this job as well, why the Shinsengumi was being made to do rat security in the shogun's palace just because the princess thought they were cute, he would never know. _This guy is really annoying…_ Gintoki thought as well, he had better things to do other than extermination the shogun's rats; this was an awful palace to think that it had rats roaming around it.

Hijikata and Gintoki started walking out to leave. When the other noticed that the other was about to leave and they were now parallel in walking out, they both paused and glared at each other. After that pause, they continued walking with more speed, ignoring the people in the palace that had noticed them and the loud crash behind them caused by Kagura and Okita's fight. They both continued speeding up to reach the outside of the palace, grunting and adding more speed when they noticed the other was getting in front of them.

"Yorozuya!" Hijikata screamed, annoyed, not knowing the exact reason. "Mayonnaise freak!" Gintoki screamed back, walking faster. They were too focused on being faster than the other in leaving the palace and didn't notice a little rat in front of them already. They didn't notice the cries and begging of the familiar voices of Shinpachi and Kondo either. "Ah! A rat!" Kagura screamed. "I won't let you!" Okita yelled. "Wait! You're destroying the palace! Kagura-chan!" Shinpachi yelled. Kagura aimed for the little rat to kill it, Okita right behind her to stop her. Hijikata and Gintoki were continuing their little race, quickly reaching to where the little rat was. The rat went squeak and looked over to where Kagura and Okita was and turned to look over where Gintoki and Hijikata was, they were all going to kill his little poor self…. So he ran out of the way.

Making Kagura hit Gintoki and Hijikata instead.

"Ouch…" Hijikata grunted, feeling something heavy over him. He noticed the silver strands of hair on top of him and saw Gintoki, squinting and clenching his teeth from pain. "That hurt…." Gintoki grunted as well, when he opened his eyes he saw Hijikata under him and staring. He realized the position they were in, he was on top of Hijikata. He wanted to quickly stand up and get himself off of him but a huge block of wall was on top of him, breaking cause of Kagura. "Ugh…" Gintoki cursed he tried looking away from Hijikata and Hijikata did the same, noticing that the other couldn't stand up and all they could do was wait for help.

Gintoki would glance and Hijikata from time to time, the other did the same. Gintoki notices that Hijikata's legs were spread and that one of Gintoki's knees were in the middle of them. _Ugh… just had to be there… how did we end up in this position anyway… jeez… it's all that Kagura brat's fault, she'll be getting some proper punishment when I get out of here, also, WHY THE HELL ARE THEY TAKING SO LONG TO GET US OUT OF HERE _Gintoki thought, a vein popping on his forehead.

"Oi! Anybody there?" Hijikata screamed, he concluded that no one knew they were both down there and tried asking for help. "…ah? No way… they would have totally noticed us earlier…" Gintoki said. "Well… even if they did, I think they're first priority would be to stop those two brats from destroying te palace, so they'd definitely ignore us… but if we're lucky there might be some servants or guards around that could hear us and help us out of here…" Hijikata said, making a point.

Gintoki looked at Hijikata "Well… I guess that's true…" he said. "Yeah, so start shouting…" Hijkata said. "Ugh… why won't you do it… it's already hard to keep this position you know! I have a huge wall on top of me and you're just lying there… if it weren-" Gintoki wanted to continue complaining, Hijikata interrupts him. "Alright, alright, already! I'll do it… and… I guess I should help a bit…" Hijikata said, he reluctantly placed his palms on the wall behind Gintoki's head. Gintoki's face was right between his arms, and they had to completely face each other. They both stare at the other, feeling more awkward in their position and at the same time as well, adverted their eyes from the other.

"Ah… oi, start screaming…" Gintoki said, and then he immediately thought of a perverted way of taking those words and the position they were in and continued. "…screaming for help.. err… to get us out of here…" Gintoki said, eager to not make eye contact. "Yeah.. That's what I plan to do… OI! ANYONE OUT THERE?" Hijikata yelled. He continued yelling but after some time that felt like hours, no one responded. "Are you serious…. Ugh… *pant*…" Hijikata nearly coughed, he was nearly out of breath from screaming too much. "…jeez, those brats are definitely going to get it from me after this…" Gintoki said, he unconsciously looked over Hijikata when he heard the other panting for breath.

Gintoki's eyes widen, there was Hijikat under him, out of breath, mouth slightly open with flushed cheeks, furrowed eyebrows and with a look of worry and confusion on his dark eyes. Gintoki stared. "Ugh…" Hijikata gulped down and took a deep breath. "Oi! HURRY UP AND GET US OUT OF HERE!" Hijikata screamed. Nothing happened.

"….jeez… it's impossible" Hijikata sighed; he closed his eyes and continued to breathe harder. He opened his eyes again and finally noticed Gintoki's stare. "What is it?" he asked. "Eh? No… nothing" Gintoki replied. _It's just you looked sort of…_

* * *

"…sexy" Gintoki smirked remembering the first time he had looked at Hijikata that way. The tied up man squirmed a bit. "Ah… after that, we were eventually saved… by ourselves, right? ahaha" Gintoki laughed remembering how they got out of that situation in the past. "…we stared at each other and then all of a sudden you look down and noticed I had a boner you immediately blushed and started punching and kicking. Of course, I had to protect myself so... I started blocking your attacks and forgetting that I was supporting myself and the wall on my back with my hands… so the wall pushed me down on you… you got a good feel of my crotch on yours… and you somehow destroyed the wall with a punch that was directed at me… I was lucky enough to evade from that ahaha.." Gintoki laughed again.

"After that…I would always absentmindedly think of you…" Gintoki said in a more serene tone as he continued. The body didn't move. "Oi, are you listening? This is like me confessing all over again, well, I don't mind…" Gintoki said. "…but I would sure love a good look on your face"

The body squired a bit. "Haha, well, it can't be helped; I'll just admire you from here… Toushiro-kun" Gintoki smirked; indeed, he stared at the tied up body in the cage in front of him. The tied up vice-chief could feel the heaviness of the stare, squirming again a bit. "Ah, remember when we would always bump into each other? I always thought it was fate after that time and how lucky I really was; at first I didn't think that way though. I'm a man after all and tried to force myself to think that I wasn't attracted to another man…." Gintoki continued his story. "…but then you had to go and show you're coolness and lovely features to me…" Gintoki said, calming his voice compared to when he started speaking.

"It wasn't love at first sight, but you definitely left an impression… then I just gave in to what I felt…" Gintoki said. "…you were actually the one who gave me the last push to confess, do you remember?" He asked, knowing the other couldn't answer. "...smiling at me and telling me not to give up, not that I needed you to tell me that, and looking all cool even with your blood covered face…" Gintoki continued, remembering the face Hijikata made. "…I just couldn't stop myself and went on to give you a smooch…"

"Ahahaha! You should've seen the look on your face that time!" Gintoki laughed, the body squirmed again a little. "…now, now, don't get mad, you were adorable! Then you just had to go and kick me in the face… but… I still got you to fall for me though…" Gintoki said. "Hijikata Toushiro… is mine, Gintoki Sakata's property… ever since the moment you were the one who willingly kissed me, I caught you…"

* * *

Author: I have nothing to say except for the usual… characters aren't mine, sorry for errors, sorry if it's a bit confusing, thanks sooooo much for the reviews/faves/follows, reviews and flames are loved… I shall… since the princess will be appearing…. Probably next chapter, I shall add a link to a drawing of the princess! Thanks so much for reading and bothering to read the author's note~!


	9. Chapter 9

Catch 9

"We've arrived…" Sakamoto announced while he pushed the doors open. Gintoki was inside facing the vice captain who was still tied up and had his back facing Gintoki. The vice captain sat up when he heard sakamoto, his back was still facing the two. Gintoki didn't even flinch at seeing the earlier lifeless body move, even though he had intensely stared at the man in the entire trip.

"Oi, Kintoki, I said, We've arrived at the planet~!" Sakamoto said again. He approached Gintoki from behind and stood behind him. "You know you didn't really have to volunteer for keeping an eye on him, right? But thanks anyway ahahaha~!" Sakamoto laughed. Gintoki finally stood up and faced him. "…for this guy, I think I'm the only one who can keep an eye on him." He said.

"Woah~! Look, Look, it's beautiful!" Kagura cheered, she stood at the highest part of the ship with sparkling eyes and a drooling mouth. "It looks like a candy planet!" Said comparison was true. The planet looked a lot like the float the princess was riding before on the parade on earth. It was like the float was made of a little part of the planet. The planet had a pink, red, and green atmosphere. When they entered and landed. The sky was a pink hue while the clouds were light pink, some purplish in the distance, apparently signalling a coming rain.

The mountains looked like blue cotton candy as it was covered by the violet and blue green leaves of the trees growing on it. The river, oceans, and seas were a mixture of all different bright colors. It was a complete rainbow planet. "This is… really… too much…" Shinpachi's face turned bluish the second he set eyes on the planet. Mutsu and Sakamoto appear behind them with Gintoki holding the leash connected to the collar around the vice chief's neck. The white pillow case was still covering his face, Shinpachi sighed, at lease he would be able to see how mad the vice chief was right now.

Finally, the ship landed and they were greeted by thousands of guards, the princess at the very end. The group of guards all made a aisle for them as Sakamoto and Mutsu started walking down from their ship. Shinpachi, Kagura, Gintoki with the vice chief followed. The princess stood up from her colourful chair, getting scolded by one of the guards nearest her, and looked excitedly at the vice chief. Like in the parade on earth, she was wearing another unicorn puke design kimono. Apparently the reason why she wore a kimono on the parade was to at least capture the hearts of the humans in some way where the aliens would respect their traditional wardrobe.

The princess ignored her guards and ran toward Sakamoto and the group. Sakamoto's eyes lighted up, as if anyone would be able to see it, and opened his arms to greet the princess in a "friendly" way. "It's really nice to be here again-" Sakamoto said, but the princess just passed him and headed toward the vice chief. She stood right in front of the collared man with sparkling eyes. She bowed her head to him and lifted her arms horizontally. She then began to twirl around with a genuine happy smile. "What's she doing?" Kagura asked.

"I think… maybe it's a custom?" Shinpachi said. "What a weird custom, is it for welcoming?" Gintoki said and the three begun doing the same thing in front of the guards who had a "what the fuck are they doing" face pasted on them. "I don't believe that is what she is trying to do… Saka-" Mutsu started speaking, noticing how the guards looked, she glanced at Sakamoto…. who was also doing the same "Welcoming dance". A vein popped on her forehead and without holding back, she kicked him down. "OUCH!" Sakamoto cried. "That's enough!" Mutsu ordered, the other three ignored her. She approaches them to kick them as well, but a guard stops her.

"The princess… I believe she is trying to show off her new kimono to the shinsengumi human." The guard explained that she wore knowing that most male humans liked to see girls wearing it. Mutsu looked at the princess; the princess had stopped twirling and was now eagerly waiting for a reaction from the vice-chief. She had sparkles on her eyes while the one she wanted to show off too had his head covered and only darkness reflected in his eyes. Mutsu sighed, it would be troublesome to make the princess unhappy now, and they really wanted the deal.

Mutsu approached one of the guards that could understand their language to translate to the princess. Mutsu told the alien that the vice chief liked it, the alien nodded his head and went to inform the princess. Without the others understanding what he was saying to the princess, Gintoki, Kagura, Shinpachi, Sakamoto, and Mutsu waited for the princess's reaction. Unknown words left the aliens mouth while the princess listened carefully. Gintoki and the others stared, no reaction. The alien was still talking. The vice chief was just standing, not knowing what he was hearing. The alien was still talking, now using his hands to explain apparently, the princess still hasn't reacted. Gintoki and the others continued to look, already wondering why the alien was taking so long, was their language that difficult. They thought.

"Why is he taking so long?" Gintoki started.

"Oh, look at what his hands are doing!" Sakamoto said.

"He made a whole with his thumb and index finger, is that an okay sign? " Shinpachi wondered.

"Ah now his using his pointing finger and inserting it to the while he made." Kagura said.

"Woah, what is trying to say? He keeps taking it out and putting it back." Gintoki said

"Is he trying to say what I think he's trying to say?" Sakamoto said.

"What did you make him say?" Gintoki said, getting perverted thoughts.

"I just said that the vice chief was okay with the dress" Mutsu answered.

"I don't think that's how he understood it." Kagura said.

"Ah the princess finally reacted." Shinpachi said.

They all looked.

The princess, made a face filled with disappointment, glanced at Gintoki and the others and then back at the guard then to the vice chief, then glared at Gintoki and the others. "EEEEEEEEEEEHHHHH? What did he say?" the all thought.

The princess walked back to where her chair was while the guard took the vice chief to follow the princess, the vice chief sat on the chair…. And the princess sat on him. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!

The translating guard approached them. "The princess is very happy." _SHE IS?_ They all thought. "Isn't that great? ahahaha" Sakamoto just laughed. The guards finally start walking, carrying the princess's chair with the princess all giddy and the seemingly doll vice chief under her. Gintoki and the others followed them to the princess's rainbow castle. Kagura's eyes sparkled as she looked everywhere inside the candy castle while Shinpachi swore he was going to have cavities. Gintoki just kept looking at the princess and the vice chief as they walked. Sakamoto and Mutsu were already talking with some of the guards.

The princess finally stood up from her very comfortable seat she glanced at the vice chief and looked at Gintoki and the others before leaving them and mentioning something about needing to change clothes. Gintoki was about to approach the vice chief, unfortunately the guards take the vice chief and head over to where the princess went. "Ah, where are you taking him?" Gintoki asked but the guards ignored him.

"Well, deal complete!" Sakamoto appeared behind Gintoki.

Author: so sorry for taking so long~ glad there are still some who wants me to continue it, thank you all sooooo much~!


	10. Chapter 10

Catch 10

* * *

As soon as the words were processed by Ginotki Sakata's brain, his jaw dropped making a dark square while his eyes, usually looked like those of a dead fish, became slightly bigger with doom written in them instead of pupils. His head turned in a complete 180 degrees and faced Sakamoto who was behind him. Sakamoto laughed while the guards in the background shrieked in fear. "Ahahaha! Don't worry~ Don't worry~ we can stay for a while to buy souvenirs and take a tour if you want too!" Sakamoto happily stated, completely naïve of his friends inner grief.

"Sa-sakamoto?" Gintoki quivered his hand up to Sakamoto, trying to reach the man's neck. His body had turned back to normal now, reason as to why it became like that, unknown. "Wha-what about the vice-commander?" He asked with his voice shaking a bit. Sakamoto's shoulders dropped with a silly smile and furrowed eyebrows he spoke "Well… I'm sure the shinsengumi will understand!"

With that one line, Gintoki punched Sakamoto hard in the gut. "GUUUUUUUWA!" Sakamoto let out as he flew quite a distance from his sudden attacker. Shinpachi, Mutsu, and Kagura were busy playing around the castle to care. Gintoki slowly approached Sakamoto as he talked, his face completely showing how mad he was. "Sakamoto…" he whispered in a menacing tone, "….ye-yes?" Sakamoto answered as he clutched his swollen cheek and tried to get up. "…you'll be paying for everything we want as souvenirs, won't you?" Gintoki said, which caught the attention of his two brats. Shinpachi nad Kagura appeared behind Gintoki while faces full of hope.

"ahhhahahaha… of course~!" Sakamoto laughed. The three of them cheered while Mutsu sighed as she face-palmed.

* * *

"I doubt I'd want anything in this planet though…" Shinpachi mentioned. "Then don't buy anything, more for me!" Kagura said. Shinpachi ignored and continued. "I guess I'll buy Sis something…" "Forget about whether you want it or not, get everything if it's going to get paid for!" Gintoki said as he raised his fist in the air. "You not only plan on punching him but you're going to make him go bankrupt as well? That's too mean, Gin-san…. Why'd you have to punch him anyway?" Shinpachi asked. Gintoki remained silent. The three of them, with two guards behind them were now walking down the pink road of petals on their way to the different shops near the rainbow castle.

"Hey…" Kagura looked at one of the guards, one that could understand them; the guard looked back with a questioning look. "What will the princess do with Toshi-aru?" She bluntly asked. This made Gintoki stop in his tracks. The guard took a second to translate her words in his head and finally replied. "What is this Toshiaru?"

"Ah… no, sorry, she meant the vie-chief of the shinsengumi, the one that the princess took for a deal with Sakamoto-san." Shinpachi explained, in a slow manner, wanting the alien to understand it. The alien took three seconds to answer. "Toshiaru, Sakamoto-san's death will gum." He replied. "What? What are you saying-aru?" Kagura asked. "Ah, no, maybe he didn't catch it that well… let me try again." Shinpachi calmed Kagura down. "What will the princess do with the person she took?" Shinpachi tried again.

"Toshiaru, hime stalker." The guard replied, rather quickly this time. "What the hell is he saying-aru?" Kagura commented. Shinpachi sighed. "This is too much of a language barrier… let me try again…" Shinpachi said but was interrupted when the guard talked again. "Toshiaru, saying-aru, princess-aru death will come for you-aru-aru-aru-aru-aru"

"Did he malfunction-aru?" Kagura said. "malfunction-aru-aru-aru-aru" the guard continued. "He's not a machine! And stop talking; I think he's trying to copy you for some reason!" Shinpachi snapped. "Gin-san! The language barrier is too big and broad! What do we do-?" Shinpachi looked back to where Gintoki was. He was no longer there. "Eh?" Shinpachi looked around. "AH! He left us behind to get souvenirs and spend all the money on his own-aru! That old man-aru!" Kagura screamed, mad. "Gin-san!" Shinpachi called out. "Own-aru-aru-aru-aru-aru" the guards repeated. "Oh just shut up! And why did the other guard join in?! We need to look for Gin-san!" Shinpachi screamed as he followed Kagura, already running off somewhere.

* * *

Gintoki watched as Shinpachi, Kagura, and the guards run while he hid behind violet bushes that surrounded the pink petal road. He stood up as soon the group disappeared from his dead fish eyes. "Now then…" he said to himself as he looked back at the rainbow castle.

He sneaks his way back in the castle, not wanting any attention, he goes as far as to hit an innocent guard unconscious and take his attire. He covered himself best to look like one of the guards of the castle. _Where should I even start?_ He thought as he looked around, he was back at the room where they were first taken. He looks at the door where the princess and the vice chief disappeared into and approached it. He was able to open the door easily. It led to a hallway where there was one huge door at the very end with a multiple of differently decorated doors at on each side.

_Guess I'll have to check all of them._ He opened them all with ease, not for his eyes. One door led to two aliens in the middle of making more aliens, Gintoki nearly puked. One door led to the aliens bathing area, Gintoki wanted to pull his eyes out. _What sort of mouths are those?_ He staggered as he tried to open the next doors, all showing such beautiful sights like the first two. _Why am I doing this? Plus, why are those aliens doing those things in the princess's castle? Is this place 'that' kind of place? Does it provide blessing for that kind of thing? Wait…._ Gintoki paused as he was about to open the very last door. _Could it be… the princess also… with the vice-chief…_

He quickly opened the last door, hoping that that door contained what he wanted to see, wishing that it was the he finally found the reason why he wanted to get back and check on the castle and even let Kagura and Shinpachi spend all the souvenir money and probably not get him anything and even dine at some fancy restaurant and eat all the delicacies of the planet until they barf and become unable to move and get fat while he… hasn't had anything to eat that day, now that he thought about it.

What was behind that door was… Sakamoto and Mutsu drinking with some guards.

"Oh! Kintoki! Do you want to join us?" Sakamoto invited. Gintoki paused for a second and closed the door. _**Where the hell is the princess and the vice-chief?!**_

* * *

And so, Gintoki began his desperate adventure in the rainbow planet in search of his beloved vice-commander shinsengumi, who might honestly have gotten raped by the alien princess who had every authority to take him. The princess, who was a female, that loved Hijikata Toushiro of the shinsengumi. The princess, though not human but still a female that had made a deal in favour of Sakamoto and most humans of the earth, never mind the sad one, there is only one anyway. The princess who will probably soon be making a new breed of their kind, human blood mixed in, since she is a 'she' and therefore can produce babies with Hijikata Toushirou who is male and should be with a female, doesn't matter if it was an alien or not. What matters is that it's a female with a working womb. The princess that could provide Hijikata Toushirou everything, even a mountain of mayonnaise and a mountain of babies, babies are adorable after all, who wouldn't want a mountain of them.

"What are you saying? Why are you emphasizing the whole the princess has a golden, cash, mayonnaise decorated V and I have a sardine wrapped and rotting P?" Gintoki said. "Do you read minds? Just because you were witness to my grief of searching for the vice-chief you think you have the right to rub all of those things in my beautiful face? Do you want a fight? Why are you even here? Why were you watching me? Were you really trying to piss me off, bastard?" Gintoki snapped. He made silly faces as his face appeared in different angles, the number of popping veins in his forehead and cheeks increasing as he became more furious.

"Ah… no… that is… I just wanted to know if you were looking for the princess…" the alien, Gintoki was getting pissed at said. "So there was actually one that can understand out language…." Gintoki sighed.

* * *

Author:…...sorry it took so long, thank you sooooo much for the reviews, follows, and faves~! Till next update then~!


	11. Chapter 11

Catch 11

After being enslaved by the alien, treated like he was nothing more than garbage of the human body, dirt in homeless old man's nail Sakata Ginto-GUWAAA…

"Shut up! Stop spouting nonsense; I know you can understand me! Who's the one being treated as disgusting poop? It's you! It's you! And if you don't want your face or whatever that is stuck on your head, you better tell me where the vice-chief and the princess are!" Gintoki shouted as he continued stepping on the poor guard. The nose bleeding guard finally extended his hand and pointed to one of the doors. Gintoki stared at the door… and kicked the guard more harshly. "Are you joking with me? I've been in that door already! You really want more do you? Are you a masochist? Sorry I'm really not interested!" He continued his torture.

"….me no talk Japan" the alien finally said. _DIE…_ finally, Gintoki finished him off with a strong kick to the head, leaving the guard unconscious. "Tch… forget about him, too troublesome, I'll find another way to find them…" Gintoki said to himself. He walked in front of the door that the guard pointed at. _I swear I've been here before…_Gintoki sighed _well… I've already seen a lot of eye gouging scenes, mind as well double check._ And so, Gintoki opened the door lazily. What greeted him was Sadaharu wearing a kimono, looking a lot like the kimono the princess had on her earlier. "Arf" Sadaharu barked, along with wearing the kimono he also had some red stuff in his mouth. Gintoki closed the door.

After a few seconds he opened it again. Sadaharu greeted him again with a bark while wagging his tail "Arf." The scene didn't change. He closed and opened it again, Sadaharu getting excited and thinking it was a game, he moved step by step as Gintoki opened and closed the door came nearer the former joi. _The scene isn't changing!_ Gintoki inwardly screamed. He finally accepted what he saw and left the door open, letting Sadaharu bite his head freely, blood flowed elegantly down his face.

Gintoki grabbed Sadaharu's fluffy ears and pulled him off him and nearer his face, they were now face to face. "He-hey… Sa-sadaharu… you-you couldn't ha-have… eat-eaten anything bad…. Did you?" he shakily asked, honestly wishing the dog god would respond in a way he wanted. Sadaharu just barked and shook off Gintoki's hands off of his ears and grabbed Gintoki by his yukata. "Hey? What-what are you? Am I next? Is this how you repay me for taking care of you? Oiiii~!" Gintoki screamed but Sadaharu just dragged him in the room and walked to one of the walls. The wall opened to Gintoki's surprise and Sadahru walked in the secret path.

Sadaharu finally released Gintoki from his fangs when they reached a garden. Gintoki looked around; it looked very earth-like. Blue skies, green grass and a little pond with koi fishes, completely imitation a traditional Japanese garden. _Where is this? Are we back on earth?_ He thought he was about to walk further in but stopped when he noticed two figures standing next to each other in the garden. They were below a huge beautiful sakura tree in full bloom. Pink petals scattered around them as the kimono dressed princess stared at the pillow case covered face of the vice-commander.

_I bet he has no idea what's happening._ Gintoki thought. _How in the world did Sadaharu know of this place anyway? _Gintoki turned to look at Sadaharu's face which was the same as usual, with a bit of blood pouring down his mouth and stuck to his fur. _And where did the blood come from?_ Gintoki looked at the princess and the vice-chief. The vice-chiefs butt was bleeding, pants and underpants torn off, it had a huge bite mark. _Oh…_

The princess continued to stare into the vice-chief, lovingly. _Aren't they going to do anything? They're just going to stand there like statues? Isn't this supposed to be some sort of secret date? What are they doing?_ Gintoki thought. _It's given that the princess really likes Hijikata-kun but… I wonder if this Hijikata-kun might end up liking her instead. _

After an hour, Gintoki had already begun to get bored and was playing with imitation flowers in the garden he had one stuck to his nose. The two hasn't moved. Finally the princess breathed in deeply and came closer the vice-chiefs head and whispered something. She then pressed her body against the vice chief. She still had the paper fan covering her half of her face and her hands completely covered by the kimono's sleeves. The vice-chief took a step back, probably feeling a little uncomfortable. _What? What's happening? She moves fast, doesn't she? No need to hold back now, she's practically all over you! _Gintoki thought.

He continued to watch as the princess nearly pushed the vice-chief into the sakura tree, the vice-chief had nowhere to go. _Alright..ah-_ Gintoki paused, there was a guard behind him. "juukkuioiklpopo?" _What? Now that I think about it that's the first time I've heard them speak their lanugange…_The guard grabbed Gintoki by the arm and pulled him out of the garden along with Sadaharu. _Well... I guess that's that…_ _I should just… give up…right… after all… I'm just a worthless lazy poor man…_

"Alright! Let's all go home!" Sakamoto announced. Kagura and Shinpachi had returned, both the guards taking care of them completely exhausted and ending up wearing ridiculous clothes and carrying everything they had bought. Gintoki and Sadaharu ended up joining Mutsu and Sakamoto and they spent the entire time waiting for the kids drinking. Sakamoto looked at Gintoki and patted his shoulder. "Are you alright?" Sakamoto asked, this took Gintoki by surprise and he smiled a bit. "Yeah…" he replied.

"Ummm… wait a minute!" they all heard from behind them, they were now in front of Sakamoto's ship and was ready to leave. The one who called out to them was the vice-chief still having the pillow-case on his head, the princess was behind him. "Oh… ah…ahahaha… what's wrong?" Sakamoto asked a bit worried. Gintoki stayed silent. "Don't worry about the shinsengumi they'll be completely fine without you-aru" Kagura said. "This is for the sake of the entire human-race Hijikata-san, you shouldn't be picky and just stay here…" Shinpachi added. "That's right… even if you want to go back… I won't let you…" Gintoki finished.

"That's not it!" the vice-chief shouted. "Is it really okay? Don't you love me anymore? If this is how you're going to just let me go… then… then… I won't let you go back to earth!" he threatened. "EEEEEHHHHHH?" Sakamoto screeched. "You had THAT kind of relationship?"

"No way in hell! I don't know what he's talking about! Aren't you happy here already?" Gintoki shouted back. "Even so! If you can't even… if you can't even fight for Hijikata-san, for me…." The vice chief continued. "eeeeeeeeeeh? What are you saying? That' why it's really convenient for me for you just stay here…. I just wanted to make sure you'll be happy here cause my Toshiro might end up worrying, that'a cute troublesome trait of him." Gintoki continued. "Eh?" The imposter asked. "There's no way I'd confuse Toshiro with anyone else!" Gintoki declared. "Yeah, good luck then-aru" Kagura said, waving goodbye. "Eh? Eh? What do you guys mean? What's going on?" Sakamoto asked. "Don't worry Sakamoto-san, the princess seems satisfied, just let her think that he's Hijikata-san" Shinpachi said.

"Bye bye then… good work in trying to catch up to me and lose weight though, it wasn't for nothing? See, you got to nab a princess, Tetsu!" Gintoki finally said before they all disappeared from sight.

"Ah…ah… you guys…" Tetsu shivered. "DON'T LEAVE ME HERE!"

"Oi, Sougo, have you seen Tetsu anywhere? Those yorozuya bastards are gone too, think they maybe up to something?" Hijikata asked. "Don't know… they're all better off gone anyway…" Okita said. Hijikata stared at him for a while, confused. "What are you saying…" Hijkata said before he left and walked away. "Well… that's just how I handle competition, I guess…" Okita yawned.

Author: Finished~! not… aha, this is kinda rushed, I'm really sorry, sorry for errors and everything else that you might find wrong with this aha. Thank you so much for the reviews, you make me all so happy~! Thank you really!


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